Regret

Stricken with regret. I am an old man.

Well, once you've had these feelings, you will be feeling damn tired.


I couldn't sleep last night. Maybe the air-con temperature was adjusted too high. I'm going to have insommnia. After all the 'mugging' and all. Frankly speaking, I dun even call it studying. It's just daydreaming sometimes. If I had electrodes attached to my brain to show any unusual activity of brainwaves, it's in lala-land. Well, (insert bad word here) it, why can't we all study when the time arises? Why can't we be prepared for an emergency? How can we be so susceptible to environmental fluctuations? Like the chinese saying goes: wind blows, stirring grass. We're not E. coli in a culture medium, but we are living things.

Here I go spouting nonsense again; this ain't gonna help one bit.

I hope next time I could settle down and study, and dun just stone away in lala-land.

***

After all my exams, I went straight home. I knew I was doing a stupid thing. It was last min studying. I had to use the hints from the lecturers, but it turned out that the ones that I did study, did not appear on the exam script. My stamina for exams was extremely low. 10 mins into the exam and I'm already stressed up. I thought I had survived the tests, hence I would survive the exams. I was wrong. I

I came in the exam hall last min (I'm going to break this new habit). Next time, my planning would have to be day by day, instead of doing 'random/chance' studying - this would help me allocate time for each subject. And give myself some time to relax instead.

I don't want to rattle on on how much I've thought about studying, since I was never a good example of exam-readiness. I suck at it. My GPA is stagnant at 2.7. I'm hoping it doesn't drop any further.