I had been very much looking forward to the evening yesterday. It was Wild Empire's Concert. And I recalled that I had 3 friends there: Ek Ngee, Zion, and Shan Yu. Though I did not realise until later, that I know Jason Yeoh from MI, and Ms Ong, who auditioned me previously in her acapella workshop @ TP. I realise that Ms Ong was also the conductor for NYJC... The threads of human relationships strewn around me.
It was an excellent performance that surpassed my expectations. It was my first time hearing them though. If thinking in terms of entertainment, it was very entertaining, with their acapella Christmas Carol session most refreshing with their upbeat clapping, movement and choreography. Definitely the work of Ms Ong, and maybe Ek Ngee.
I went with GK, and for most part of the show, he appeared unimpressed. He was impatient, so to speak. He wasn't in the mood, I thought. He wasn't even willing to enjoy / listen and criticise. I was only capable of the former, and not constructive critiscism. I think my listening is quite flawed. Why? The seasoned listeners come up with comments I did not expect (e.g. sopranos were out of breath because they sounded thin). But to me, it was all really fault-picking. Like pitching problems.. Nothing can be perfect. What is more important, would be that singers came up with a creative/ faithful rendition of the original music piece composed.
Try as I may. I did not hear any significant mistakes to compromise the quality of the songs. The context of some being sacred pieces me and GK obviously didn't enjoy.. But what can I say. Choir came from the church.
Some of the last chords signalling the end of the song sound really pleasant, and after that, I cannot remember the body of the song, or the content which was sung. I cannot make out the words in Loch Lomond, or that I wasn't paying attention.
In summary, this was what he said to me, "watching concert in the past had a lot of meaning. Now... no meaning."
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Some Art News
Was shopping with my mum @ Raffles City, when I came across this Art Gallery which hosts asian artwork. Sculptures and paintings mostly. This dark skinned lady that showed us around the gallery and explained to us patiently, was real nice.
http://odetoart.com/
***
I feel the impulse to acquire this book.
PRACTICAL AIM (excerpt)
"After great pain, what would the body
learn that it does not already know
of relief? When that fire-truck has raged
past, what do I rediscover about silence
except that I would always miss it?
Do trees mind if it is the same wind
that passes through their heads everyday? ..." (Wong, 2006)
Reference:
Wong, C.. (2006). Like a Seed with a Singular Purpose. Singapore: FirstFruits. Retrieved 30 December 2006 from http://www.cyrilwong.com/Htms/seed.htm
http://odetoart.com/
***
I feel the impulse to acquire this book.
PRACTICAL AIM (excerpt)
"After great pain, what would the body
learn that it does not already know
of relief? When that fire-truck has raged
past, what do I rediscover about silence
except that I would always miss it?
Do trees mind if it is the same wind
that passes through their heads everyday? ..." (Wong, 2006)
Reference:
Wong, C.. (2006). Like a Seed with a Singular Purpose. Singapore: FirstFruits. Retrieved 30 December 2006 from http://www.cyrilwong.com/Htms/seed.htm
Wednesday, December 27, 2006
no one to turn to
I decided to go back to TP choir in order "to promote" the concert.
OK. Well it didn't go according to my plan.
Sometimes I feel no connection at all to the current members there. Perhaps I got too pessimistic, too emotional and silent at the end of the practice. (Digressing: HOWEVER HOWEVER, I am not a quiet person - in contrast, my friends I dined with at lunch even felt I was too talkative)
Anyway, left my peeps at TP Choir soon enough with a disappearing act. Hope I won't need to do that too often. I was too disoriented and emo. =( They were singing ok, given their few numbers. I felt a sense of disorientation when the pitching problems present themselves in the face. And ok then, here's a snippet from Wei Min: "you all sound too choral.." bleh, I forgot. TP Choir aka acapella group.
Negative sentiments aside, I felt hope in every one of the members present there. I can't believe WM was there either. She is definitely a great help, given her experience and musicality. What help can I offer besides my voice, when the guru is around?
They take breaks too often I believe, often due to lack of discipline, or direction from a disciplined leader (a choral director can provide). This is most unfortunate. I wish that a godsend might help keep their numbers from dwindling further.
WM played the piano, some Chopin piece I believe, in a way that made me feel that pianists are able to channel their thoughts and express themselves, through their hands and fingers. Like she always plays the punchline when she's tired out. I suspect it was her music that made me emo. Did it have the same effect on others?
I will be back again on thursday to find I'm not too emo again.
***
CYRIL WONG - recognised local poet
Cyril Wong is the name of the Singaporean poet featured on the SPicy section of the Mediacorp Arts Central, weekly 30 min Arts entertainment guide, Front. He labelled Front as a 'bimbotic' show. Which goes to show I'm not too far above the intel level of bimbos. -.-
Anyway. He turns out to have performed with a Singapore small choir group, THE SINGERS, which have attained international acclaim just recently... hmm. interesting. What's more interesting is his works of literature that have managed to make breakthrough globally.. Definitely keeping my eye out on those titles.
OK. Well it didn't go according to my plan.
Sometimes I feel no connection at all to the current members there. Perhaps I got too pessimistic, too emotional and silent at the end of the practice. (Digressing: HOWEVER HOWEVER, I am not a quiet person - in contrast, my friends I dined with at lunch even felt I was too talkative)
Anyway, left my peeps at TP Choir soon enough with a disappearing act. Hope I won't need to do that too often. I was too disoriented and emo. =( They were singing ok, given their few numbers. I felt a sense of disorientation when the pitching problems present themselves in the face. And ok then, here's a snippet from Wei Min: "you all sound too choral.." bleh, I forgot. TP Choir aka acapella group.
Negative sentiments aside, I felt hope in every one of the members present there. I can't believe WM was there either. She is definitely a great help, given her experience and musicality. What help can I offer besides my voice, when the guru is around?
They take breaks too often I believe, often due to lack of discipline, or direction from a disciplined leader (a choral director can provide). This is most unfortunate. I wish that a godsend might help keep their numbers from dwindling further.
WM played the piano, some Chopin piece I believe, in a way that made me feel that pianists are able to channel their thoughts and express themselves, through their hands and fingers. Like she always plays the punchline when she's tired out. I suspect it was her music that made me emo. Did it have the same effect on others?
I will be back again on thursday to find I'm not too emo again.
***
CYRIL WONG - recognised local poet
Cyril Wong is the name of the Singaporean poet featured on the SPicy section of the Mediacorp Arts Central, weekly 30 min Arts entertainment guide, Front. He labelled Front as a 'bimbotic' show. Which goes to show I'm not too far above the intel level of bimbos. -.-
Anyway. He turns out to have performed with a Singapore small choir group, THE SINGERS, which have attained international acclaim just recently... hmm. interesting. What's more interesting is his works of literature that have managed to make breakthrough globally.. Definitely keeping my eye out on those titles.
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Choir Concert @ Esplanade
Concert Title
A Musical Journey
Concert Information
Baroque, Renaissance, Gregorian, Avant Garde - each of them represents a different musical period, a different musical influence.
Join The South West CDC Vocal Consort on A Musical Journey to rediscover the choral works of each musical era. Under the guidance of renowned choral director, Mr Nelson Kwei, the choir will be presenting pieces by Franz Joseph Haydn, John Rutter, Anton Bruckner, Mihiyo Mamiya, etc. Under the influence of each musical period, these composers have penned choral pieces unique to each musical period and in doing so, helped further shaped each period.
Experience for yourself the defining choral style of each musical period and bring home with you a deep appreciation of the different choral styles.
This concert will be held at Esplanade Concert Hall on 28th January, 2007, Sunday, 7.30pm. The guest choir for this concert is the National University of Singapore (NUS) Choir.
This event will be graced by Dr. Amy Khor Lean Suan, Senior Parliamentary Secretary for Environment and Water Resources, and Mayor of the South West District.
Ticket Information
Tickets are priced at $26, $23, $19 and $17 (excluding SISTIC charges) and are available now at all SISTIC outlets, SISTIC Hotline: (65) 6348 5555
You can also purchase your ticket electronically through SISTIC website: http://www.sistic.com.sg/cms/events/index.html?content=635
Alternatively, you can order your ticket through (me!!) any choir member of The South West CDC Vocal Consort.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Awkward
Just some musings..
It feels so awkward, singing in a room and picking out friendstrangers. Strangers in a sense that might have the potential to become best friends. And now Friends amongst strangers. We sang out the lyrics in the song, "Distant Land", though it was about the reunification of East and West Germany - start with me and you. Do we practise what we preach?
I think I am choosy over my friends. They must satisfy a personal criteria of having personal habits that I can accept. This kind of 'personal selection'. But if everyone were friends, how would the world around us function? And what kind of person would I be if I had all the friends under the sun. Would I be still the same person, with my unique habits and talents, or subjected to social homogeneity... etc.
But in a typical Singapore social setting like this, we adhere firmly to the norms of our culture. No one is loud. No one dares to stand out and rebel, for fear of being cast-aside, fear of being ridiculed.
Rant aside. I was facing a girl directly across the room, using her as a focal point of interest whenever my eyes strayed from the conductor. Yes. (what's her name?) Because she was pretty, so I also wonder if I stared too many times. Of course, attractiveness catches your eyes - but I know it's rude. The thing is, I am sorry in the possible event that my candid gazing might make her uncomfortable. But where else, what else should I do, but let my eyes wander, instead of staring at the floor, fixed on the conductor, or eyes closed?
Let your eyes wander.. Why not just keep them under control! XD
It feels so awkward, singing in a room and picking out friendstrangers. Strangers in a sense that might have the potential to become best friends. And now Friends amongst strangers. We sang out the lyrics in the song, "Distant Land", though it was about the reunification of East and West Germany - start with me and you. Do we practise what we preach?
I think I am choosy over my friends. They must satisfy a personal criteria of having personal habits that I can accept. This kind of 'personal selection'. But if everyone were friends, how would the world around us function? And what kind of person would I be if I had all the friends under the sun. Would I be still the same person, with my unique habits and talents, or subjected to social homogeneity... etc.
But in a typical Singapore social setting like this, we adhere firmly to the norms of our culture. No one is loud. No one dares to stand out and rebel, for fear of being cast-aside, fear of being ridiculed.
Rant aside. I was facing a girl directly across the room, using her as a focal point of interest whenever my eyes strayed from the conductor. Yes. (what's her name?) Because she was pretty, so I also wonder if I stared too many times. Of course, attractiveness catches your eyes - but I know it's rude. The thing is, I am sorry in the possible event that my candid gazing might make her uncomfortable. But where else, what else should I do, but let my eyes wander, instead of staring at the floor, fixed on the conductor, or eyes closed?
Let your eyes wander.. Why not just keep them under control! XD
Thursday, December 14, 2006
The Time Machine
Welcome to my new blog, The Time Machine (as of 14 December). Good name? Am I aspiring to be French? =)
Feel free to leave your comments on any of the previous posts, on the current ones. If you're ready to leave, check out the links on my sidebar.
***
Rotten Tomatoes. Provides a compilation of reviews by many movie critics. Never watch a lousy movie again!
Cosmic variance. An excellent blog by physicists. Digging into the archives, here's a good read on a movie review on "Mr and Mrs Smith".
http://cosmicvariance.com/2005/07/19/brad-and-angelina/
NCBI Science Primer. Provides good background information on Biology.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/About/primer/
Feel free to leave your comments on any of the previous posts, on the current ones. If you're ready to leave, check out the links on my sidebar.
***
Rotten Tomatoes. Provides a compilation of reviews by many movie critics. Never watch a lousy movie again!
Cosmic variance. An excellent blog by physicists. Digging into the archives, here's a good read on a movie review on "Mr and Mrs Smith".
http://cosmicvariance.com/2005/07/19/brad-and-angelina/
NCBI Science Primer. Provides good background information on Biology.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/About/primer/
The New World; New times too
Movie: I got this Movie "The New World" on DVD, reserving it for a time to watch with friends. So, who's interested? I don't mind borrowing it to any movie lover. So, if you're interested, organise a get-together sometime and we can watch it together. =)
Music: Been listening to Queen, Jazz (Diana Krall, Hirai Ken), Bach. Been trying to memorise songs for the upcoming concert in January. The Observatory is the local band making music that currently captures my ears.
Books: Hunters of DUNE, which my brother bought me for my birthday this year. *Sigh* not getting any younger anymore.
TV: I was watching the Princess Hours, because I got addicted to their jokes after a long day's work.
Work (project): takes up 90% of my time. Yes, it is addictive to think about the latest discoveries in research and their implications for the human universe. Man, I love this work.
Unfulfilled dreams:
1) buy an acoustic guitar for playing real songs and compose.
2) become a research scientist and know what-the-hell everyone in the room is talking about.
3) enlarge my pool of close friends.
Music: Been listening to Queen, Jazz (Diana Krall, Hirai Ken), Bach. Been trying to memorise songs for the upcoming concert in January. The Observatory is the local band making music that currently captures my ears.
Books: Hunters of DUNE, which my brother bought me for my birthday this year. *Sigh* not getting any younger anymore.
TV: I was watching the Princess Hours, because I got addicted to their jokes after a long day's work.
Work (project): takes up 90% of my time. Yes, it is addictive to think about the latest discoveries in research and their implications for the human universe. Man, I love this work.
Unfulfilled dreams:
1) buy an acoustic guitar for playing real songs and compose.
2) become a research scientist and know what-the-hell everyone in the room is talking about.
3) enlarge my pool of close friends.
Bach and Genetics
Bach's music pieces feel just like looking at the genome assemblies (sufficient to relate to looking at a single chromosome) under the UCSC Genome Browser, each a melodic sequence of complexity, strewn with repetitive elements, and signposts indicating ends of musical phrases. Each musical phrase itself is anagolous to a gene coded by a sequence of different frequency notes. It is beautiful in its complexity, and something to be studied in all its detail.
Thoughts run through my head: whether or not this is by any chance, God's creation, it is wonderful. It prods human imagination to interpret each of these sequences and the observable trends (e.g. the polymorphisms). It would take many human lifetimes to unravel the mysteries behind the human genome sequence. Just like unravelling the art that J.S. Bach created centuries ago.
Played on Piano by Andras Schiff - English Suite No.6 in D minor, BWV 811: I. Prélude (moonlite/desolation, chaos).
In brackets, contain the visual imagery I perceive in the piece. Basically, darkness dominates as painted by the minor key. It really resembles the famed movement in Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. Chaos breaks out after the first 2.20 mins. Then come the punch-in-the-face resolution, the final chord.
But that can be said for many of Bach's pieces.
Thoughts run through my head: whether or not this is by any chance, God's creation, it is wonderful. It prods human imagination to interpret each of these sequences and the observable trends (e.g. the polymorphisms). It would take many human lifetimes to unravel the mysteries behind the human genome sequence. Just like unravelling the art that J.S. Bach created centuries ago.
Played on Piano by Andras Schiff - English Suite No.6 in D minor, BWV 811: I. Prélude (moonlite/desolation, chaos).
In brackets, contain the visual imagery I perceive in the piece. Basically, darkness dominates as painted by the minor key. It really resembles the famed movement in Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. Chaos breaks out after the first 2.20 mins. Then come the punch-in-the-face resolution, the final chord.
But that can be said for many of Bach's pieces.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
A Daydream
"I've never looked back since."
What a nice ending to a chapter of a story. It suggests the protagonist doesn't regret his current course in life. But...
.
.
.
That is probably not the case. Healthy our neurons are, we are haunted by memories of the past. It is quite inevitable for me to look back. Then I realise how much I missed those times. It was strange enchantment bestowed upon me 2 years ago, the "Voyage of Songs" in Genting. How time has preserved those memories to a dreamlike state.
A flood of memories...
When - please - no - not back to work... Reality comes back and kicks you in the face. How I wish it doesn't have to be that way all the time. I wish I won't need to compartmentalise my brain for interacting with friends and work.
What a nice ending to a chapter of a story. It suggests the protagonist doesn't regret his current course in life. But...
.
.
.
That is probably not the case. Healthy our neurons are, we are haunted by memories of the past. It is quite inevitable for me to look back. Then I realise how much I missed those times. It was strange enchantment bestowed upon me 2 years ago, the "Voyage of Songs" in Genting. How time has preserved those memories to a dreamlike state.
A flood of memories...
When - please - no - not back to work... Reality comes back and kicks you in the face. How I wish it doesn't have to be that way all the time. I wish I won't need to compartmentalise my brain for interacting with friends and work.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
The Vocal Consort
I'm in. Went for a practice. It seems the members have changed to a younger generation since I last saw their concert 2 years ago...
Well, I felt like joining SYC since their Gloria concert on last Sunday... Their concert repertoire was a bit imbalanced... But I liked the first part, Missa Lorca (the premieres) by C. Margutti, and Carol to st stephane. Feels damn shiok and awe.... But since Xiao Xuan suggested the Vocal Consort and cited a degree of preference over it, I've decided to tag along too.
XX is my favourite junior, by the way.. Haha. =) I've not seen anyone extend such a warm welcome to me in ages. I feel re-energised. Thanks.
And Vox Camerata... I forgot to mention/ review their concert. I think they are very neat.. I rank them above both choirs. Becos they're the cool, arty-farty, the experienced guys... Well, maybe next time. I'd be keen on all their concerts.
Anyway, I saw Edith and Kevin (from ages since Secondary 2) at VC. Edith, well she's still the same. Kevin has obviously been through NS.
Who else did I meet, Hafiz (the pres), Joy, Jim, Adrian, Yi Hern (Bass SL), Nelson Kwei (choral director)... Even saw Mr Goh (Zechariah) there too, but he's not in VC.
Good. won't forget them names.
Well, I felt like joining SYC since their Gloria concert on last Sunday... Their concert repertoire was a bit imbalanced... But I liked the first part, Missa Lorca (the premieres) by C. Margutti, and Carol to st stephane. Feels damn shiok and awe.... But since Xiao Xuan suggested the Vocal Consort and cited a degree of preference over it, I've decided to tag along too.
XX is my favourite junior, by the way.. Haha. =) I've not seen anyone extend such a warm welcome to me in ages. I feel re-energised. Thanks.
And Vox Camerata... I forgot to mention/ review their concert. I think they are very neat.. I rank them above both choirs. Becos they're the cool, arty-farty, the experienced guys... Well, maybe next time. I'd be keen on all their concerts.
Anyway, I saw Edith and Kevin (from ages since Secondary 2) at VC. Edith, well she's still the same. Kevin has obviously been through NS.
Who else did I meet, Hafiz (the pres), Joy, Jim, Adrian, Yi Hern (Bass SL), Nelson Kwei (choral director)... Even saw Mr Goh (Zechariah) there too, but he's not in VC.
Good. won't forget them names.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Reflection
I've been provided with a chance to explore christianity in greater detail. Religious experience might enrich my 'scientific-bombed' brain with newfound values I could cherish.
I'm not seeking a transformation. I might be psycho-ed until I become one of them. But nevertheless, I don't blindly believe; but neither do I believe 'Ignorance is Bliss'.. Wisdom is the ultimate saving grace. And the first law that applies is to be obedient to my parents who have given me life. Well my dad is anti-church...
I have a perverse interest in the History of Jesus Christ and his miracles. Living in GenerationY 2000 years later. I wish to immerse myself and learn the naked TRUTH behind the MYTH (even though it is impossible to do so), and WHY people glorify the Christian God. I shall keep a cool head, and believe fragments of history as I go along. It's all for the sake of philosophy.
* Some free thoughts *
I shall keep my ear out for music and the hypnotics. (PARANOIA ALERT) I'm only terrified of Evangelism and the worship part. It's like... hey.. God cannot hear us. He lives beyond reach of our Dimension. And I know... the big E is necessary to ensure survival of the religious belief. You Christians have a great capacity to love, and that ain't bad to realise.
Faith is often unreliable as compared to Science. Perhaps God meant for us to be masters of our world. Not the little sheep feeding on his fields... But little sheep managing their lives in order, growing their own gardens, leading their own herds.. The lord won't be my shepherd. Maybe Jesus died, bcos God meant for us to manage our own affairs in order. No more interference from God! Hence, I will shepherd myself. Thus I won't need faith.
My Eastern beliefs are sufficient, and some override Western Christianity beliefs... Now, for the myth and the missionaries who have propagated thus far..
I'm not seeking a transformation. I might be psycho-ed until I become one of them. But nevertheless, I don't blindly believe; but neither do I believe 'Ignorance is Bliss'.. Wisdom is the ultimate saving grace. And the first law that applies is to be obedient to my parents who have given me life. Well my dad is anti-church...
I have a perverse interest in the History of Jesus Christ and his miracles. Living in GenerationY 2000 years later. I wish to immerse myself and learn the naked TRUTH behind the MYTH (even though it is impossible to do so), and WHY people glorify the Christian God. I shall keep a cool head, and believe fragments of history as I go along. It's all for the sake of philosophy.
* Some free thoughts *
I shall keep my ear out for music and the hypnotics. (PARANOIA ALERT) I'm only terrified of Evangelism and the worship part. It's like... hey.. God cannot hear us. He lives beyond reach of our Dimension. And I know... the big E is necessary to ensure survival of the religious belief. You Christians have a great capacity to love, and that ain't bad to realise.
Faith is often unreliable as compared to Science. Perhaps God meant for us to be masters of our world. Not the little sheep feeding on his fields... But little sheep managing their lives in order, growing their own gardens, leading their own herds.. The lord won't be my shepherd. Maybe Jesus died, bcos God meant for us to manage our own affairs in order. No more interference from God! Hence, I will shepherd myself. Thus I won't need faith.
My Eastern beliefs are sufficient, and some override Western Christianity beliefs... Now, for the myth and the missionaries who have propagated thus far..
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Influx of Thoughts
Actually I went down to the Festival of Praise and the Youth Service @ the Bedok Church, when Pris invited me. Yeah, I had a bit of fun in both places. It was quite an eye-opener for me, the uninitiated.
But now it opened my mind to an influx of thoughts, which I'm still getting organised @ the moment.
Well, EXAMS AHOY. =)
But now it opened my mind to an influx of thoughts, which I'm still getting organised @ the moment.
Well, EXAMS AHOY. =)
Monday, July 31, 2006
I promise.
I just wanna be a better friend. When you need me, I would abandon all my altruistic reasons. My sincerity will never be compromised.
... and that's because I need you too.
Farewell, Jonathan Lin... >.< Going to US for studies in Business. Do yourself proud... Wonder how much you might change. Don't pick up the bad stuff though. I'll keep in touch.
... and that's because I need you too.
Farewell, Jonathan Lin... >.< Going to US for studies in Business. Do yourself proud... Wonder how much you might change. Don't pick up the bad stuff though. I'll keep in touch.
Saturday, July 15, 2006
When I finally talked about the problems, it got a heavy load off my chest.
You pointed out some of the things about me that seriously sucked. Good. I believe they are true, because of my experiences. Well. (shh. don't think too much, precious.)
Damn it, I don't believe in solidified Personalities. I will try my best to change. Hm..
Anyway thanks. You've made me feel like deleting some of my posts.
WTF. 4 quizzes next week.
*Dun read my blog, It drains away your precious energy, most of the time. It's true.*
You pointed out some of the things about me that seriously sucked. Good. I believe they are true, because of my experiences. Well. (shh. don't think too much, precious.)
Damn it, I don't believe in solidified Personalities. I will try my best to change. Hm..
Anyway thanks. You've made me feel like deleting some of my posts.
WTF. 4 quizzes next week.
*Dun read my blog, It drains away your precious energy, most of the time. It's true.*
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Some feed for thought
Your Brain is 73% Female, 27% Male |
 Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you! |
Where's my macho-ism? @_@ Ok, I would take this quiz again, after I've gone through NS!!
Kenny, I got this quiz from your site.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Admist bits of scrap.
You'd think you could almost change the world....
when a tonne of anvil drops on your head,
and leaves you lying, quite dead.
You'd think you could almost change the world....
You'd think you could almost change the world....
when a tonne of anvil drops on your head,
and leaves you lying, quite dead.
: : : * ::
: * O * ::
: : [ ] ::
: : ] [ ::
when a tonne of anvil drops on your head,
and leaves you lying, quite dead.
You'd think you could almost change the world....
You'd think you could almost change the world....
when a tonne of anvil drops on your head,
and leaves you lying, quite dead.
: : : * ::
: * O * ::
: : [ ] ::
: : ] [ ::
Saturday, July 01, 2006
A bunch of Rubbish thoughts
Who knows, where did Time went?
Or what became of, the days that were spent?
He sat there, deep in thought,
contemplating the very existence he sought,
He imagines the green and grey trees flying by,
viewing from a bus window,
shining on a dusty highway,
stretched across a countryside, speeding wide.
*crumples up screen like a piece of paper and throws in the recycle bin*
Bad poetry. Abandon hope, all ye who read.
Disturbing thought: Information is not lost in black holes, but preserved in some ways. Hawking hypothesised that universes without black holes cancel out the effect of universes where information is lost (with black holes).
Losing information in black holes can be analogous to losing Data in a physically damaged Flash Drive. Argh. Hence, I can emphasise with this feeling of helplessness.. All information will eventually be lost one day, unless some smart arse comes along and makes it his duty to study it. *shrug*
Or what became of, the days that were spent?
He sat there, deep in thought,
contemplating the very existence he sought,
He imagines the green and grey trees flying by,
viewing from a bus window,
shining on a dusty highway,
stretched across a countryside, speeding wide.
*crumples up screen like a piece of paper and throws in the recycle bin*
Bad poetry. Abandon hope, all ye who read.
Disturbing thought: Information is not lost in black holes, but preserved in some ways. Hawking hypothesised that universes without black holes cancel out the effect of universes where information is lost (with black holes).
Losing information in black holes can be analogous to losing Data in a physically damaged Flash Drive. Argh. Hence, I can emphasise with this feeling of helplessness.. All information will eventually be lost one day, unless some smart arse comes along and makes it his duty to study it. *shrug*
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Loosing some angst
zhaong hates quarrelsome people~! :@ -> ie. J.S.W.K.
People have their limits. Stop pushing me around. Fuck off.
A relationship trapped in constant conflict, without resolution is not the way to go. I see it as exploitative, and detrimental to my mental health.
It's a wonder I didn't listen to some of my friends. I wonder if I can handle this strain (absorbing all the insults you have given me) on my own in a Zen meditative state, sieving through this residual crap of unconstructive criticism, distasteful behaviour, and phoniness, in exchange for the unrecognisable truth.
You're a goddamn phony, you. You may be clever, cursing lecturers behind their back, with your string of vulgarities. Your all-mighty, declaring you could make use of me. {I will not be patronised!} Your boorish behaviour puts you in the category of people I would avoid. Not all boorish people are bad - at least some are kind, and some repent. You are beyond redemption, or my help.
You place value in materialistic things. Damn you. I don't think so highly of people like you. You've drifted so far apart from my initial assumptions about you. Good luck. Chase your own material dreams if you want.
All you care about, is yourself.
Continue to piss me off, if it amuses you. But you will not be entertained further.
People have their limits. Stop pushing me around. Fuck off.
A relationship trapped in constant conflict, without resolution is not the way to go. I see it as exploitative, and detrimental to my mental health.
It's a wonder I didn't listen to some of my friends. I wonder if I can handle this strain (absorbing all the insults you have given me) on my own in a Zen meditative state, sieving through this residual crap of unconstructive criticism, distasteful behaviour, and phoniness, in exchange for the unrecognisable truth.
You're a goddamn phony, you. You may be clever, cursing lecturers behind their back, with your string of vulgarities. Your all-mighty, declaring you could make use of me. {I will not be patronised!} Your boorish behaviour puts you in the category of people I would avoid. Not all boorish people are bad - at least some are kind, and some repent. You are beyond redemption, or my help.
You place value in materialistic things. Damn you. I don't think so highly of people like you. You've drifted so far apart from my initial assumptions about you. Good luck. Chase your own material dreams if you want.
All you care about, is yourself.
Continue to piss me off, if it amuses you. But you will not be entertained further.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
Can't sleep
I'm being troubled by a host of thoughts again. A legion of voices clamour in my head, "hear me, hear me..." I will hear you one at a time. Please, just leave me alone.
Images and memories... Regrets and flashes of conversation, fill my mind like a bubble waiting to burst.
These feelings of inadequacy.. they are really unjustified.
Caffeine overdose.. from tea? Once it's past twelve, I really need sleeping pills.
Melatonin please.
Images and memories... Regrets and flashes of conversation, fill my mind like a bubble waiting to burst.
These feelings of inadequacy.. they are really unjustified.
Caffeine overdose.. from tea? Once it's past twelve, I really need sleeping pills.
Melatonin please.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
I reflected upon your blog entry, if you pop by here by any chance...
Kenny has a way of expressing himself, that I'm envious of. If only my family background wasn't so conservative, I bet I'll be a different person altogether. But I'm not complaining. I have come thus far, but I'm still capable of differentiation.
The primary cause for me adopting this 'nerdy' persona, would be because I'm obedient, and thus ingrained with a coat of ethics in manhood my father nagged - and nagged - since a young age. And perhaps the Bookworm Club stressed the lesson 'Knowledge is power', once too many. They would visit my primary school often to sell their books, and influence all the kids to become wanna-be Edisons. --//
You know I had a typical 'Christmas Carol' dream when I was young (maybe 10 years or so). Maybe it was because I watched the movies, read the book, or watched that TV Drama Serial about doing good because you're forced to.
I dreamt I was going to die soon. And I better chalk up on my karma. Santa's not giving me anymore presents. So I better be a good boy and behave... Oh that crap sorta fused into my mentality, since I think a lot, and go on a lot of mind escapades of the non-logical kind.
Well. This entry draws to a close.
At least I won't be thought of as a hypocrite anymore.
I'm at peace with myself.
Kenny has a way of expressing himself, that I'm envious of. If only my family background wasn't so conservative, I bet I'll be a different person altogether. But I'm not complaining. I have come thus far, but I'm still capable of differentiation.
The primary cause for me adopting this 'nerdy' persona, would be because I'm obedient, and thus ingrained with a coat of ethics in manhood my father nagged - and nagged - since a young age. And perhaps the Bookworm Club stressed the lesson 'Knowledge is power', once too many. They would visit my primary school often to sell their books, and influence all the kids to become wanna-be Edisons. --//
You know I had a typical 'Christmas Carol' dream when I was young (maybe 10 years or so). Maybe it was because I watched the movies, read the book, or watched that TV Drama Serial about doing good because you're forced to.
I dreamt I was going to die soon. And I better chalk up on my karma. Santa's not giving me anymore presents. So I better be a good boy and behave... Oh that crap sorta fused into my mentality, since I think a lot, and go on a lot of mind escapades of the non-logical kind.
Well. This entry draws to a close.
At least I won't be thought of as a hypocrite anymore.
I'm at peace with myself.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Tuesdays with Morrie
the book discussion today was fulfilling. It was a pity that most people were @ home watching World Cup.
Filter out the incoherent thoughts... pressure release...
*snore*
STOP - and reflect.
The book discussion today was INDEED worth my time. I made a great friend today, named Suet Feng. We viewed part of the movie based on the book... which I think was not that great as compared to the simplicity of the book, in which the facts were lain out in front of you for analysis.
She was a brave listener, and suffered hearing my array of disparate thoughts. As shown by Morrie Schwartz, I think time is the greatest courtesy (you have given me) we can bestow on people - although it's wicked to take other people's time for granted. I would attend these book discussions to explore more of other people's perspectives.
I figured out, like Morrie said philosophically, friends do not need to be discriminated by age, or appearance.
However, in most living creatures, they have this 'compatibility analysis' complex (something I coined). In which one sizes up the other... Is this person good enough to be my friend? Is he a threat/obstacle to my ambitions? Is he handsome enough, pleasant mannered, what benefits can I obtain by keeping his friendship... Is he wasting my time?
*oops... not a cynical view, but just probing scientifically with blunt, objective, and analytical questions*
Or take a look at racial discrimination, or the practice of vivisection. Why do we see animals as low-lives, when they do suffer pain and torment? No wonder God tortures us everyday, for what we've done (a cool spiritual thought) to those down the evolutionary ladder... This is just a prime example of the 'incompatibility complex'.
Then we must cross this uncomfortable incompatibility barrier which exists throughout the universe. Virtual space. The inert line that acts as a barrier between attraction and repulsion... After that, we are subjected to variables that exist in the four dimensions.
Oops. this influx of 'chim' thoughts is driving me crazy... by the urge to explain simple phenomena which we take for granted everyday...
Let's put it in a simplistic, human way. After all, I am Zhong Hao...
I m de new friend tod y...
crzy crzy... where's the a?
some crzy thoughts I have.
Filter out the incoherent thoughts... pressure release...
*snore*
STOP - and reflect.
The book discussion today was INDEED worth my time. I made a great friend today, named Suet Feng. We viewed part of the movie based on the book... which I think was not that great as compared to the simplicity of the book, in which the facts were lain out in front of you for analysis.
She was a brave listener, and suffered hearing my array of disparate thoughts. As shown by Morrie Schwartz, I think time is the greatest courtesy (you have given me) we can bestow on people - although it's wicked to take other people's time for granted. I would attend these book discussions to explore more of other people's perspectives.
I figured out, like Morrie said philosophically, friends do not need to be discriminated by age, or appearance.
However, in most living creatures, they have this 'compatibility analysis' complex (something I coined). In which one sizes up the other... Is this person good enough to be my friend? Is he a threat/obstacle to my ambitions? Is he handsome enough, pleasant mannered, what benefits can I obtain by keeping his friendship... Is he wasting my time?
*oops... not a cynical view, but just probing scientifically with blunt, objective, and analytical questions*
Or take a look at racial discrimination, or the practice of vivisection. Why do we see animals as low-lives, when they do suffer pain and torment? No wonder God tortures us everyday, for what we've done (a cool spiritual thought) to those down the evolutionary ladder... This is just a prime example of the 'incompatibility complex'.
Then we must cross this uncomfortable incompatibility barrier which exists throughout the universe. Virtual space. The inert line that acts as a barrier between attraction and repulsion... After that, we are subjected to variables that exist in the four dimensions.
Oops. this influx of 'chim' thoughts is driving me crazy... by the urge to explain simple phenomena which we take for granted everyday...
Let's put it in a simplistic, human way. After all, I am Zhong Hao...
I m de new friend tod y...
crzy crzy... where's the a?
some crzy thoughts I have.
Monday, June 19, 2006
This morning I spent much of my time bumming about... I tried to find the LOTR's E-book collection online, but failed to succeed.
doo-n-doo do wah ~ t?
Just practised what I learnt from the choir's latest song, Big Spender, using Noteworthy to key in the first two bars. I want the rhythm to sink in my head. It took some time, but I understood the counting process. Count in the head.
It sounds like I'm a damn noob... But I ain't very clever. It's simple 4/4 timing... damn easy lo.. If my maths was good, I could tell str~ away, by dividing the 4 counts into 8 counts.
* Process :
Divide the content of a bar into it's constituent count units (ie. quarters).
Further divide the count units into halves (eg. 1+ 2+ 3+ 4+) - simplifying if possible.
I also tried playing the notes on the guitar.. Felt damn cool, but my rhythm ain't that good.
So tired. Drank 3 glasses of red wine @ my cousin's wedding yesterday, but manage to neutralise with jasmine tea, Ginko Biloba, and a cup of coffee. Then I stayed awake until 2+ PM. going crzy.
doo-n-doo do wah ~ t?
Just practised what I learnt from the choir's latest song, Big Spender, using Noteworthy to key in the first two bars. I want the rhythm to sink in my head. It took some time, but I understood the counting process. Count in the head.
It sounds like I'm a damn noob... But I ain't very clever. It's simple 4/4 timing... damn easy lo.. If my maths was good, I could tell str~ away, by dividing the 4 counts into 8 counts.
* Process :
Divide the content of a bar into it's constituent count units (ie. quarters).
Further divide the count units into halves (eg. 1+ 2+ 3+ 4+) - simplifying if possible.
I also tried playing the notes on the guitar.. Felt damn cool, but my rhythm ain't that good.
So tired. Drank 3 glasses of red wine @ my cousin's wedding yesterday, but manage to neutralise with jasmine tea, Ginko Biloba, and a cup of coffee. Then I stayed awake until 2+ PM. going crzy.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Da Vinci revisited
... had to sit in with 2 other friends in a cinema today. $9.50 for the opening week-'end'.
Well, what can I say. I've read the book and watched the movie. So which one is better? My advice is: read the book first before you watch the goddam movie. Why? You'd know what to anticipate. Storyline gets confusing at first. And if you are a hard-core Christian, you might stand up half-way during the film and walk out, denouncing the claims as bullcrap. Don't waste your money. Personally, I had to endure a few shadowy figures walking out directly in the row ahead of me.
I did not conduct a background study of this movie. So it was splendid with a serving of a star-studded cast, with 2 of my favourite actors, Ian McKellen + Tom Hanks. What my friend commented was that, the acting isn't that good. But he added, that's not the point. The storyline doesn't require great acting. Ian was great. I expected him to be most fitting for the role of Teabing. Tom Hanks plays any role well, with his excellent track record.
My displeasure... The beginnings at the museum was enough to drive anyone nuts. The storyline proceeded rapidly, leaving little room for the unexperienced watchers (never read the book nor heard of Da Vinci). My friends were left confused... could do better with extra explanatory footage in an Extended DVD (might not happen). The footage was a bit shaky.
Merits. The visual eyecandy was appealing.. With the depiction of the quest for the holy grail.. the history section.. was damn cool. The shock scenes, played at loud volume, with Silas jumping out at every corner, was swell.
People come out in protest, in forums, voicing their beliefs. The conspiracy theorists have designed a nasty picture of the church. But they have supporting evidence. However, much of this evidence is ficticious, and Dan Brown, the creative genius may have exaggerated part of world history... That we know not.
But let's put an end to this pointless debate: Da Vinci code would ultimately shock the believers from their rock solid foundation of faith (CULTURE SHOCK). The non-believers, would agree with this version because they don't rest on any foundation to begin with. IN THE STORY, the main character, Langdon said "Christ provides a source of human inspiration... Whereby we can remember his suffering and sacrifice, and pray to him in our darkest hour" That's the important point. Don't miss it. It's not an anti-christian piece of work.
What's more important, it's feminist, the 'Sacred feminine' concept. The die-hard believers would jump out and say, THERE IS NO SACRED FEMININE... you know. But it goes to show the value of women in our society. As this work of fiction shows, SO DARK IS THE CON OF MAN. Highlighted in the book, Christianity has defined the roles of women to a stereotypical degree (as Muslims do, I believe). It has prevented them from acquiring powerful positions in society, and bringing the societal fabric together by imposing a standard Patriachal Rule. Why is it that most churches only have Father priests residing in church? Will someone enlighten me? Why is Eve the sinner in the bible, or portrayed in a bad light? It is disconcerting, to learn about the explanation of the Witch-hunts. Women intellectuals being put on the noose, slaughtered. All because of a feud over the rule of church.
I suppose Christianity is put to the test again. First was Passion of the Christ. Now, Da Vinci. What next? God knows.
Well, what can I say. I've read the book and watched the movie. So which one is better? My advice is: read the book first before you watch the goddam movie. Why? You'd know what to anticipate. Storyline gets confusing at first. And if you are a hard-core Christian, you might stand up half-way during the film and walk out, denouncing the claims as bullcrap. Don't waste your money. Personally, I had to endure a few shadowy figures walking out directly in the row ahead of me.
I did not conduct a background study of this movie. So it was splendid with a serving of a star-studded cast, with 2 of my favourite actors, Ian McKellen + Tom Hanks. What my friend commented was that, the acting isn't that good. But he added, that's not the point. The storyline doesn't require great acting. Ian was great. I expected him to be most fitting for the role of Teabing. Tom Hanks plays any role well, with his excellent track record.
My displeasure... The beginnings at the museum was enough to drive anyone nuts. The storyline proceeded rapidly, leaving little room for the unexperienced watchers (never read the book nor heard of Da Vinci). My friends were left confused... could do better with extra explanatory footage in an Extended DVD (might not happen). The footage was a bit shaky.
Merits. The visual eyecandy was appealing.. With the depiction of the quest for the holy grail.. the history section.. was damn cool. The shock scenes, played at loud volume, with Silas jumping out at every corner, was swell.
People come out in protest, in forums, voicing their beliefs. The conspiracy theorists have designed a nasty picture of the church. But they have supporting evidence. However, much of this evidence is ficticious, and Dan Brown, the creative genius may have exaggerated part of world history... That we know not.
But let's put an end to this pointless debate: Da Vinci code would ultimately shock the believers from their rock solid foundation of faith (CULTURE SHOCK). The non-believers, would agree with this version because they don't rest on any foundation to begin with. IN THE STORY, the main character, Langdon said "Christ provides a source of human inspiration... Whereby we can remember his suffering and sacrifice, and pray to him in our darkest hour" That's the important point. Don't miss it. It's not an anti-christian piece of work.
What's more important, it's feminist, the 'Sacred feminine' concept. The die-hard believers would jump out and say, THERE IS NO SACRED FEMININE... you know. But it goes to show the value of women in our society. As this work of fiction shows, SO DARK IS THE CON OF MAN. Highlighted in the book, Christianity has defined the roles of women to a stereotypical degree (as Muslims do, I believe). It has prevented them from acquiring powerful positions in society, and bringing the societal fabric together by imposing a standard Patriachal Rule. Why is it that most churches only have Father priests residing in church? Will someone enlighten me? Why is Eve the sinner in the bible, or portrayed in a bad light? It is disconcerting, to learn about the explanation of the Witch-hunts. Women intellectuals being put on the noose, slaughtered. All because of a feud over the rule of church.
I suppose Christianity is put to the test again. First was Passion of the Christ. Now, Da Vinci. What next? God knows.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Screw those politics!
Gagging order
http://www.singaporedemocrat.org/articlebloggingban.html
Opposition views are interesting, and provide a good read. The SDP website.
The one-sided coverage of the election campaign makes one wonder if Mediacorp is having double standards... The recent blunder by Gomez has been attacked violently by the PAP in a war of words. All of them have had their say, and the media hears it.
Any ruler knows the media is one of the surest ways to subvert a population. There are undecided votes, (eg. apathethic youth) that would just sway to one side with the excessive media coverage. Underground struggles are always mere struggles. There is just no fair-playing field in Singapore politics.
Gestures. Politicians hugging babies, talking to minority races. I mean, can we have some sincerity, rather than the BULLSHIT coming out from the box? I appeal to the media: please don't air such ad nauseum on purpose, to buy undecided votes!
I admire Gomez's courage for making the apology. The leading party is complacent because of their majority, & their track record, for taking care of the majority - the more well-off.
That FTA is the only solution to our problems. Of course, international relations are important. What makes anyone think that other political parties are not as qualified? That they will not be able to carry off the FTA as well? Without political diversity, any single party in power tends to become corrupt, and a sector of the population's needs uncatered for.
Yes, the NKF saga, we won't forget. Where's the recent (unestablished) connection between Durai & the 'peanuts' comment? How can the money from the populace, in the form of taxes, in the form of sincere donations be labelled as peanuts? Can we doubt if the Party is still as pure as we think? One wonders.
"Aiyah, KNS... Politics is damn wayang lah..."
http://www.singaporedemocrat.org/articlebloggingban.html
Opposition views are interesting, and provide a good read. The SDP website.
The one-sided coverage of the election campaign makes one wonder if Mediacorp is having double standards... The recent blunder by Gomez has been attacked violently by the PAP in a war of words. All of them have had their say, and the media hears it.
Any ruler knows the media is one of the surest ways to subvert a population. There are undecided votes, (eg. apathethic youth) that would just sway to one side with the excessive media coverage. Underground struggles are always mere struggles. There is just no fair-playing field in Singapore politics.
Gestures. Politicians hugging babies, talking to minority races. I mean, can we have some sincerity, rather than the BULLSHIT coming out from the box? I appeal to the media: please don't air such ad nauseum on purpose, to buy undecided votes!
I admire Gomez's courage for making the apology. The leading party is complacent because of their majority, & their track record, for taking care of the majority - the more well-off.
That FTA is the only solution to our problems. Of course, international relations are important. What makes anyone think that other political parties are not as qualified? That they will not be able to carry off the FTA as well? Without political diversity, any single party in power tends to become corrupt, and a sector of the population's needs uncatered for.
Yes, the NKF saga, we won't forget. Where's the recent (unestablished) connection between Durai & the 'peanuts' comment? How can the money from the populace, in the form of taxes, in the form of sincere donations be labelled as peanuts? Can we doubt if the Party is still as pure as we think? One wonders.
"Aiyah, KNS... Politics is damn wayang lah..."
Friday, April 28, 2006
Rock Around the Clock
bombombombombombombombombombombom (?)x
Screw those mikes. I will bomb the stage. I swear upon the precious.
Screw those mikes. I will bomb the stage. I swear upon the precious.
Monday, April 24, 2006
F*
It is raining.
I have been cursing a lot lately. The F word is simply indispensable in daily life. A gentleman I am not. The world is simply F~'d up, you know...!
The urge to write in my blog came knocking in the aftermath of a sibling quarrel. Fresh in my mind, my great brother, the ill-spirited oaf, the temperamental, autocratic bastard, just shouted at me in the living room for me to shut up. I was taken aback momentarily with shock, for I had been walking 2 legs, and talking in the corridor to Mother. His gesture was like someone throwing a tennis ball in your face. I stopped mid-sentence, and told him to fix the computer he had been mishandling, causing a problem with the reader, damaging CDs. Esp. one I had borrowed from the school library.
Enraged, I imagined seizing a kitchen fruit knife - I had entered the kitchen - and plunging it into his heart, to end his life. He can die for all I care, until my wrath spills over.
The mentally unstable is capable of doing such things in cold blood if provoked maliciously.
But to empathise with his feelings, my wise, magnamious mother gave the reasons for his bitching about: his exam's tomorrow.
It's my turn to bitch now. His bad mood is like a storm, and uncalled for. I mean, Have you heard of someone who plays - & sings awfully - noisy hard-rock songs at loud volume for self-gratification? Have you seen someone who treats the ones he's familiar with as if he had power over them; and in front of unfamiliar people, behave like an angel? He's a tactful one, he is. The one who is full of disrespect. How can he exhibit destructive behaviour so infectiously? At home? How can he be so rude to MY parents? He doesn't deserve such kindness.
Karma will overrun him. His bad deeds will be avenged upon himself, if remain uncorrected.
If you were to catch a glimpse of my thoughts within a speech bubble, it would take the form of a continuous line, forming a convoluted mesh that has a number of intersections approaching infinity. Otherwise, it may display the usual curses, and in Hokkien too... souveniours from my beloved secondary school classmates & friends.
With such a disruptive sibling at home, that cares only for himself, how can I ever focus on my studies, and live in peace?
I have been cursing a lot lately. The F word is simply indispensable in daily life. A gentleman I am not. The world is simply F~'d up, you know...!
The urge to write in my blog came knocking in the aftermath of a sibling quarrel. Fresh in my mind, my great brother, the ill-spirited oaf, the temperamental, autocratic bastard, just shouted at me in the living room for me to shut up. I was taken aback momentarily with shock, for I had been walking 2 legs, and talking in the corridor to Mother. His gesture was like someone throwing a tennis ball in your face. I stopped mid-sentence, and told him to fix the computer he had been mishandling, causing a problem with the reader, damaging CDs. Esp. one I had borrowed from the school library.
Enraged, I imagined seizing a kitchen fruit knife - I had entered the kitchen - and plunging it into his heart, to end his life. He can die for all I care, until my wrath spills over.
The mentally unstable is capable of doing such things in cold blood if provoked maliciously.
But to empathise with his feelings, my wise, magnamious mother gave the reasons for his bitching about: his exam's tomorrow.
It's my turn to bitch now. His bad mood is like a storm, and uncalled for. I mean, Have you heard of someone who plays - & sings awfully - noisy hard-rock songs at loud volume for self-gratification? Have you seen someone who treats the ones he's familiar with as if he had power over them; and in front of unfamiliar people, behave like an angel? He's a tactful one, he is. The one who is full of disrespect. How can he exhibit destructive behaviour so infectiously? At home? How can he be so rude to MY parents? He doesn't deserve such kindness.
Karma will overrun him. His bad deeds will be avenged upon himself, if remain uncorrected.
If you were to catch a glimpse of my thoughts within a speech bubble, it would take the form of a continuous line, forming a convoluted mesh that has a number of intersections approaching infinity. Otherwise, it may display the usual curses, and in Hokkien too... souveniours from my beloved secondary school classmates & friends.
With such a disruptive sibling at home, that cares only for himself, how can I ever focus on my studies, and live in peace?
Sunday, April 23, 2006
Politics are evil.
rulers r more or less attracted by power. They ultimately deny, of course! But where's the truth? Why the hell is one old man desperately clinging on to his seat, trying to retain his power? All the same, why are rulers (emperors) fervent believers of dynasties? Do they believe their mandate (ability to rule) takes root in their genes?
What mechanisms are there in place for keeping out all opposition? Look around you for all the subtleties, and all the obvious signs. F***ed up, I say. Media coverage, giving out $$ just before the election... buying our votes.
And on the TV, talk, talk... "Your lips keep moving, but all I hear is BLAH BLAH". Just how many promises can anyone make w/o breaking them? Openess and political freedom? (Now the arrests, the police, the insiders, the pitiable sycophants which you and me are guilty of behaving) Now where is the love, MAN?
I hate soundchecks. The emcee is KING in these events. He who loves the sound of his own voice. He can make/ break an event. He is f***ing noisy. especially early in the morning, when human alertness is at peak, the din is magnified hundredfold
Policemen are stationed downstairs, so the urge to pelt them with waterbombs is curbed. I mean, who the f*** wakes up at 7.30 AM on Sunday morning, to dance tracks like CRAZY FROG? What about our way of life? This is unforgivable...
I swore - if I were above 21, and there was an opposition candidate in my constituency, I won't vote for The PAP. "But screw, I'm only nineteen". I meana what the fucka? Everyone in the house that morning, was complaining & grumbling. And I devised evil plans I would get back at them, were it not for the policemen outside, slaves with their own reserves of power.
Due to media coverage of what SM Goh has done for us. I admit I greatly respect him. But waking up a best friend prematurely from slumber for no good reason, would be enough to make a sore enemy.
You know my parents don't have a good impression of MM Lee. Deep in their hearts, they have always resented the closing of Nan Tah University, their alma mater (the current Nanyang Technological University).
Yes. Palace politics are worse. *watches Jewel in the Palace*
What mechanisms are there in place for keeping out all opposition? Look around you for all the subtleties, and all the obvious signs. F***ed up, I say. Media coverage, giving out $$ just before the election... buying our votes.
And on the TV, talk, talk... "Your lips keep moving, but all I hear is BLAH BLAH". Just how many promises can anyone make w/o breaking them? Openess and political freedom? (Now the arrests, the police, the insiders, the pitiable sycophants which you and me are guilty of behaving) Now where is the love, MAN?
I hate soundchecks. The emcee is KING in these events. He who loves the sound of his own voice. He can make/ break an event. He is f***ing noisy. especially early in the morning, when human alertness is at peak, the din is magnified hundredfold
Policemen are stationed downstairs, so the urge to pelt them with waterbombs is curbed. I mean, who the f*** wakes up at 7.30 AM on Sunday morning, to dance tracks like CRAZY FROG? What about our way of life? This is unforgivable...
I swore - if I were above 21, and there was an opposition candidate in my constituency, I won't vote for The PAP. "But screw, I'm only nineteen". I meana what the fucka? Everyone in the house that morning, was complaining & grumbling. And I devised evil plans I would get back at them, were it not for the policemen outside, slaves with their own reserves of power.
Due to media coverage of what SM Goh has done for us. I admit I greatly respect him. But waking up a best friend prematurely from slumber for no good reason, would be enough to make a sore enemy.
You know my parents don't have a good impression of MM Lee. Deep in their hearts, they have always resented the closing of Nan Tah University, their alma mater (the current Nanyang Technological University).
Yes. Palace politics are worse. *watches Jewel in the Palace*
Saturday, April 22, 2006
FUBAR
this term we shall see the demise of zhaong.
this course in poly has been v. screwed up. One of the worst experiences ever. I swear.
Nobody gives a damn but the symptoms of affliction are all over the place. Widespread apathy, as opposed to mass hysteria.
So F***ED UP. BEYOND all recognition.
Say ur prayers.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
I can cook
I must be really bored. But here's what I ate. Btw, it's Cherry Tomato Omelette (with Rosemary leaves, and garnished with Iceberg lettuce)
Monday, April 03, 2006
Music & Sign language
After a dreary morning of badminton (physical-training session), I watched Swing Girls (and a boy) at the TP library today, together with Kai Ling & Inky. We all agreed it was far better than School of Rock in terms of comedy (& standard). We were treated at the end to the wonderful solos of the cast. I can't believe my ears, they played so damn well.
It was comedy. I could have laughed throughout if I was seeing it myself. For eg. the lead character, Tomoko, sold her 'lovable' computer pasted with stickers all over the monitor, and her younger sister's playstation game, for a rusty bronze-looking second-hand sax; and the 2 brothers playing folk music who "got ditched but still loving" their ex-girlfriends from their already dismantled rock band (oh, and add a funny little ditty to go along too); And the matrix-like scene in the forest being chased by a wild boar, exhibiting stills of them taking various positions of flight, while 'A Wonderful World' (sung by Louis Armstrong) played in the background.
They played "Glenn Miller's - In the Mood", until it got stuck in my head. The piece was from lousy - without 'swing', or jazz rhythm - until the end. Typically describes how people generally learn music.
Besides, I actually signed up for some sign-language learning stuff for my own benefit. Free. What's the catch? You learn a song as a tribute to your school, and you perform the words out. Sign language is kinda cool. The instructors can do it so fast, and can communicate with a group of people with special needs.
The lyrics sound a bit forceful, not heartfelt enough. But it was sort of fun, learning the signs.
It was comedy. I could have laughed throughout if I was seeing it myself. For eg. the lead character, Tomoko, sold her 'lovable' computer pasted with stickers all over the monitor, and her younger sister's playstation game, for a rusty bronze-looking second-hand sax; and the 2 brothers playing folk music who "got ditched but still loving" their ex-girlfriends from their already dismantled rock band (oh, and add a funny little ditty to go along too); And the matrix-like scene in the forest being chased by a wild boar, exhibiting stills of them taking various positions of flight, while 'A Wonderful World' (sung by Louis Armstrong) played in the background.
They played "Glenn Miller's - In the Mood", until it got stuck in my head. The piece was from lousy - without 'swing', or jazz rhythm - until the end. Typically describes how people generally learn music.
Besides, I actually signed up for some sign-language learning stuff for my own benefit. Free. What's the catch? You learn a song as a tribute to your school, and you perform the words out. Sign language is kinda cool. The instructors can do it so fast, and can communicate with a group of people with special needs.
The lyrics sound a bit forceful, not heartfelt enough. But it was sort of fun, learning the signs.
Friday, March 24, 2006
THE WORLD TODAY.
... Up to you to make it the best yet!
Bask in glorry.. (& optimism, & hope, & love, & warmth)
Bask in glorry.. (& optimism, & hope, & love, & warmth)
Hospital visit.
It is a sorry sight, but it can't be avoided. The sights & sounds of a hospital...
A few minutes past 7 o'clock. General Hospital. Block 4. Me and Dad were alone in the elevator ascending to the 8th storey (wards and more wards).
"What is rehabilation... Is it for those drug-addicts?" Dad posed a question about the 4th floor.
Yes, I nodded. Clearly, I wasn't sure. But that answer got rid of the question.
We stepped out from the lift into a cold white corridor. A trace scent of disinfectant. Lugging along my backpack as usual, I followed in my father's footsteps as he turned around a corner to the wards on the right. We walked through this corridor, passing a sort of waiting room and reception at the end, and turned again to the right. Then we countered the third corridor with a left turn. Walls on both sides, like a maze. Glancing at signposts for a matter of guidance... and we eventually got there.
The ward was a room shrouded in dim lighting (it being the time of evening) with 4 hospital beds and a set of curtains lodged in-between each pair of beds. These were found on both sides of the room - blocking the view of the adjacent bed a patient would see when she rolled onto one side. For my Grandma, she sees the patient in the opposite bed, an elderly patient. Muslim, apparently, because she wore a black headscarf. In fact, the ward was full of old people. All on their backs, lying on the bed.
My aunt, lets-name-her Kim, was already stationed there to help Grandma, a tuft of white and grey hair sitting atop her hazel brown face, creased with wrinkles. Grandma didn't look happy. At the foot of her bed, was food uneaten, still left intact on the table. She saw us arriving, but otherwise, she was looking at the TV hanging from the ceiling at the corner of the bed. What was I going to say? My head was on a roll, grinding my preformed thoughts into fine quality thread...
Whereupon, came the usual exchange of words between family. I contributed a little. Most regrettably, I have never had the knack of successfully learning Teochew speaking dialect, hence, I have difficulty understanding what my Grandma was saying to me. As usual, the grown-ups did all the talking. I stared at the TV, and recalled a passage in 'Brave New World', where all she did was just sat there, watching the TV.
The nurse (trainee) came in. A silver timepiece hanging from her shirt pocket caught my eye, above which read her nametag. She made graceful and precise movements and did whatever she was doing. I realised she must have mastery over the Teochew dialect, for she knew how to speak.
Up till then, I was hearing a continuous croaking sound coming from the adjacent bed. I peeped, to see her mouth gaping slightly open and to confirm it as the source of the sounds. She was a stroke patient, aged 92. That's all I know, but I can't help feeling sorry for her.
My father asked me 'why'? Why was Grandma getting confused or forgetful about where she was (in hospital instead of her house). I mentioned that, of course, the brain cells are not as abundant as before, and are not replenished as fast as they are destroyed. Alternatively, but more unlikely, it might be self-denial, that her health has declined from before. I can't believe how strongly I believed in my answer to be correct. But these things, they have been around for so long, and its implications to human-life were after all essential. I answer, perhaps emotionless, in cold-blood. Maybe it was because Grandma and I weren't very close, with nothing to talk about, and difficult to talk to each other, attributing to my lack of affection.
Grandma was afflicted by a malicious virus lately. Details were not disclosed to me. But it was definitely causing trouble.
I read the plastic sachet or what they call IV drip. IV KCL. Intravenous Potassium Chloride to aid in electrolyte balance. (O... now I missed the point of this entry. Just making an attempt at description)
A few minutes past 7 o'clock. General Hospital. Block 4. Me and Dad were alone in the elevator ascending to the 8th storey (wards and more wards).
"What is rehabilation... Is it for those drug-addicts?" Dad posed a question about the 4th floor.
Yes, I nodded. Clearly, I wasn't sure. But that answer got rid of the question.
We stepped out from the lift into a cold white corridor. A trace scent of disinfectant. Lugging along my backpack as usual, I followed in my father's footsteps as he turned around a corner to the wards on the right. We walked through this corridor, passing a sort of waiting room and reception at the end, and turned again to the right. Then we countered the third corridor with a left turn. Walls on both sides, like a maze. Glancing at signposts for a matter of guidance... and we eventually got there.
The ward was a room shrouded in dim lighting (it being the time of evening) with 4 hospital beds and a set of curtains lodged in-between each pair of beds. These were found on both sides of the room - blocking the view of the adjacent bed a patient would see when she rolled onto one side. For my Grandma, she sees the patient in the opposite bed, an elderly patient. Muslim, apparently, because she wore a black headscarf. In fact, the ward was full of old people. All on their backs, lying on the bed.
My aunt, lets-name-her Kim, was already stationed there to help Grandma, a tuft of white and grey hair sitting atop her hazel brown face, creased with wrinkles. Grandma didn't look happy. At the foot of her bed, was food uneaten, still left intact on the table. She saw us arriving, but otherwise, she was looking at the TV hanging from the ceiling at the corner of the bed. What was I going to say? My head was on a roll, grinding my preformed thoughts into fine quality thread...
Whereupon, came the usual exchange of words between family. I contributed a little. Most regrettably, I have never had the knack of successfully learning Teochew speaking dialect, hence, I have difficulty understanding what my Grandma was saying to me. As usual, the grown-ups did all the talking. I stared at the TV, and recalled a passage in 'Brave New World', where all she did was just sat there, watching the TV.
The nurse (trainee) came in. A silver timepiece hanging from her shirt pocket caught my eye, above which read her nametag. She made graceful and precise movements and did whatever she was doing. I realised she must have mastery over the Teochew dialect, for she knew how to speak.
Up till then, I was hearing a continuous croaking sound coming from the adjacent bed. I peeped, to see her mouth gaping slightly open and to confirm it as the source of the sounds. She was a stroke patient, aged 92. That's all I know, but I can't help feeling sorry for her.
My father asked me 'why'? Why was Grandma getting confused or forgetful about where she was (in hospital instead of her house). I mentioned that, of course, the brain cells are not as abundant as before, and are not replenished as fast as they are destroyed. Alternatively, but more unlikely, it might be self-denial, that her health has declined from before. I can't believe how strongly I believed in my answer to be correct. But these things, they have been around for so long, and its implications to human-life were after all essential. I answer, perhaps emotionless, in cold-blood. Maybe it was because Grandma and I weren't very close, with nothing to talk about, and difficult to talk to each other, attributing to my lack of affection.
Grandma was afflicted by a malicious virus lately. Details were not disclosed to me. But it was definitely causing trouble.
I read the plastic sachet or what they call IV drip. IV KCL. Intravenous Potassium Chloride to aid in electrolyte balance. (O... now I missed the point of this entry. Just making an attempt at description)
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
I wanted to make the title of this entry 'restless wanderings of the lonely heart'.. <3
how cliche.
I can guess from the way I'm being treated by you now, approximately where I stand. I have significantly diminished in value since, since I've departed from our interactions on a regular basis. Needless now, for our rare exchange of words. Now, I know I don't mean anything at all.
It was all delusional. and I am sorry for it. (how many times do I have to summarise these stuff to get my thoughts cleared..)
I always started the conversations, and wonder when you would be able to do so. Avoid me at all cost if you will. I harbour you no ill-feelings but, from the looks of it, we might as well be strangers.
I supposed I asked too much of you. How can I force my feelings on anyone. yeah? That's exactly what I'm doing now. But, well, I need an outlet.
The winds of change are blowing, and I stand still. I suppose you have a message to give. Don't get trapped in a moment in time. Learn to change and adapt, to circumstances, to change, like a living being in an evolutionary process, or get wiped out - sorry.
how cliche.
I can guess from the way I'm being treated by you now, approximately where I stand. I have significantly diminished in value since, since I've departed from our interactions on a regular basis. Needless now, for our rare exchange of words. Now, I know I don't mean anything at all.
It was all delusional. and I am sorry for it. (how many times do I have to summarise these stuff to get my thoughts cleared..)
I always started the conversations, and wonder when you would be able to do so. Avoid me at all cost if you will. I harbour you no ill-feelings but, from the looks of it, we might as well be strangers.
I supposed I asked too much of you. How can I force my feelings on anyone. yeah? That's exactly what I'm doing now. But, well, I need an outlet.
The winds of change are blowing, and I stand still. I suppose you have a message to give. Don't get trapped in a moment in time. Learn to change and adapt, to circumstances, to change, like a living being in an evolutionary process, or get wiped out - sorry.
Monday, March 13, 2006
It's time to fall asleep
my days are getting quite meaningless to begin with.
I see no point in my existence in 'cyberspace'. I doubt I'd be missed, unless I make my appearances less often. I wonder how come none of my old CCA peeps are talking to me? Is it bcos they have taken offense at me quitting for no apparent reason at all? Nobody understands how I felt the subsequent weeks following which I 'quit choir', stopped myself coming for practices... I desired someone, anyone, to tell me I'm still needed, unless my presence is of no value at all...
For which I waited and waited... But no query came. No question of what was happening to me:
"Depressive, addictive withdrawal; it was hell,
Sunlight burning the snail inside the shell..."
-some ditty I came up with on the spot
Questions tormented me in my sleep. ~but it was all for the best I suppose. The stress was something to be dealt with on its own. And I had one less excuse for my academic mistakes. Unanswered questions.. Up till now, I wanted to stop thinking, to let things rest.
Days of listening to Bach's Double Violin Concerto in D Minor BWV 1043 II (Largo Ma Non Tanto) of sweeping melancholy. Sweet at the beginning, then progresses to such sweet sorrow, like the weeping of 2 ladies. Well... I dunno... that's what it sounds like to me.
No matter, my secretive nature was difficult to understand to begin with. Let me live my life, love and die in peace. The boy in the well (~REM).
I see no point in my existence in 'cyberspace'. I doubt I'd be missed, unless I make my appearances less often. I wonder how come none of my old CCA peeps are talking to me? Is it bcos they have taken offense at me quitting for no apparent reason at all? Nobody understands how I felt the subsequent weeks following which I 'quit choir', stopped myself coming for practices... I desired someone, anyone, to tell me I'm still needed, unless my presence is of no value at all...
For which I waited and waited... But no query came. No question of what was happening to me:
"Depressive, addictive withdrawal; it was hell,
Sunlight burning the snail inside the shell..."
-some ditty I came up with on the spot
Questions tormented me in my sleep. ~but it was all for the best I suppose. The stress was something to be dealt with on its own. And I had one less excuse for my academic mistakes. Unanswered questions.. Up till now, I wanted to stop thinking, to let things rest.
Days of listening to Bach's Double Violin Concerto in D Minor BWV 1043 II (Largo Ma Non Tanto) of sweeping melancholy. Sweet at the beginning, then progresses to such sweet sorrow, like the weeping of 2 ladies. Well... I dunno... that's what it sounds like to me.
No matter, my secretive nature was difficult to understand to begin with. Let me live my life, love and die in peace. The boy in the well (~REM).
My first Quiz..
You scored as Libra. You get along best with the sign of Libra. Altough Librans may appear as fickle or indecisive, they are wonderful friends to have. Librans constantly strive for balance; they do their best to make sure life runs smoothly and fairly for everyone. They are considerate, tactful, loving people. Who could posibly resist a Libran's charm =D ?? They are lovers of art and beauty. The only problem with Librans is that they can be very clingy and dependent upon others at times.
What sign of the Zodiac are you meant for? created with QuizFarm.com |
I am a Scorpoi... Although, I only follow horoscopes to a limited-or-none extent nowadays. I wonder why I'd get along with a Libra now... I must rewire my brain circuitry. My major flaw.
Beating the holiday blues
When I received my results, I immediately felt relieved at the prospect of not taking any supplementary papers; but otherwise, later on, I felt a sinking sense of despair, knowing too well my accumulated grades so far, will carry me nowhere...
My GPA is 2.73. Stagnation. My Cross Disciplinary Subjects (CDS) 'Intro-' 'Economics', 'Sociology' are the only ones I'm proud of in my result slip, having scored 'Z's (Distinction)... Otherwise, I won't even show people my results... (I'm an 'A'-less student)
It has always been my ambition to become an Auror. Whoops. Strike off that line. To become an Author, more like it. An ambition inspired by the magical books of Roald Dahl, Dick King Smith... I've read since young. Enid Blyton was far too English for my tastes... Delving in English Mythology... like Enchanted trees, elves, pixies, Wishing Chairs... all these I can remember. Children's books have an unlimited scope of imagination.
Anyway, what happened today? Physical Training Session: Played badminton at school with KaiL and JingS... So, it was a 2 vs 1 match. And being the guy of course, I had to be the one running around the 1 man-field. Not that I mind, not at all. They didn't seem to mind my lack of ability at playing proper badminton. Yup. All of us could do with some improvement, from the way I've seen others play. I was lucky I didn't smack mercilessly this game, like I did always. So I got away this time without being scolded. Wonder what would it be like next week with Inky and Devi coming to join us.
After that, KaiL went for her breakfast bcos she didn't have it. And then we watched the Ring.. I was seriously spooked-out, but otherwise impressed at all the visual imagery depicted during the course of the film. Oh man. Picking off live fly from a frozen television image~ getting a nosebleed in the process. And that hi-frequency girl ghost. All the fast-forwarded action... ready to shock the wits out of you. Definitely a cursed videotape. I hope I don't get nitemarez. But of course, I like the scenery of the lone maple tree in the Mountain Inn. Ashamed of myself, I am. For only I freaked out, while KL & JS took it as not scary at all.
Meanwhile, went home to watch Full Metal Panic II The 2nd Raid... and Fruits Basket... to remove all unwanted feelings of shock...
Seven days. I can't wait.
My GPA is 2.73. Stagnation. My Cross Disciplinary Subjects (CDS) 'Intro-' 'Economics', 'Sociology' are the only ones I'm proud of in my result slip, having scored 'Z's (Distinction)... Otherwise, I won't even show people my results... (I'm an 'A'-less student)
It has always been my ambition to become an Auror. Whoops. Strike off that line. To become an Author, more like it. An ambition inspired by the magical books of Roald Dahl, Dick King Smith... I've read since young. Enid Blyton was far too English for my tastes... Delving in English Mythology... like Enchanted trees, elves, pixies, Wishing Chairs... all these I can remember. Children's books have an unlimited scope of imagination.
Anyway, what happened today? Physical Training Session: Played badminton at school with KaiL and JingS... So, it was a 2 vs 1 match. And being the guy of course, I had to be the one running around the 1 man-field. Not that I mind, not at all. They didn't seem to mind my lack of ability at playing proper badminton. Yup. All of us could do with some improvement, from the way I've seen others play. I was lucky I didn't smack mercilessly this game, like I did always. So I got away this time without being scolded. Wonder what would it be like next week with Inky and Devi coming to join us.
After that, KaiL went for her breakfast bcos she didn't have it. And then we watched the Ring.. I was seriously spooked-out, but otherwise impressed at all the visual imagery depicted during the course of the film. Oh man. Picking off live fly from a frozen television image~ getting a nosebleed in the process. And that hi-frequency girl ghost. All the fast-forwarded action... ready to shock the wits out of you. Definitely a cursed videotape. I hope I don't get nitemarez. But of course, I like the scenery of the lone maple tree in the Mountain Inn. Ashamed of myself, I am. For only I freaked out, while KL & JS took it as not scary at all.
Meanwhile, went home to watch Full Metal Panic II The 2nd Raid... and Fruits Basket... to remove all unwanted feelings of shock...
Seven days. I can't wait.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
4 MAR
back from the exams.. and term hell... what u call it.
There is no curse in tongues worthy of the hell I've been put through. Oh. Thank god I survived.
But what is left before me, puts me to misery.
8 weeks of holidays.. Now who would want to employ someone for 2 months, with no prior job experience, and no worthy skills.. As I slump back in my home as a latch-key child. I thought, I'm 18 years of age, and should behave somewhat better than Harry Potter. Pardon, I read the last 2 books. Reading 'Half-blood prince' now. The jokes in the story are quite nice... Every named character has a purpose and fills room in the story.
Anyway. I thought about things like doing the housework, and cooking; since I'm in a dual-income household. Heck. The stuff churned out of my wok was hmm... cooked sardine tomato lettuce salad and lightly boiled ham. The sardine and ham was precooked of course.
And the one who occasionally turns up in my mind.. Why do I have to shrug off the feeling that I'm being avoided, that I have significantly put our friendship in jeopardy, this time? Well, when will time allow me to be forgiven? Singing, 'Only fools rush in' when I'm none the wiser...
When will I learn?
There is no curse in tongues worthy of the hell I've been put through. Oh. Thank god I survived.
But what is left before me, puts me to misery.
8 weeks of holidays.. Now who would want to employ someone for 2 months, with no prior job experience, and no worthy skills.. As I slump back in my home as a latch-key child. I thought, I'm 18 years of age, and should behave somewhat better than Harry Potter. Pardon, I read the last 2 books. Reading 'Half-blood prince' now. The jokes in the story are quite nice... Every named character has a purpose and fills room in the story.
Anyway. I thought about things like doing the housework, and cooking; since I'm in a dual-income household. Heck. The stuff churned out of my wok was hmm... cooked sardine tomato lettuce salad and lightly boiled ham. The sardine and ham was precooked of course.
And the one who occasionally turns up in my mind.. Why do I have to shrug off the feeling that I'm being avoided, that I have significantly put our friendship in jeopardy, this time? Well, when will time allow me to be forgiven? Singing, 'Only fools rush in' when I'm none the wiser...
When will I learn?
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