I'm reading this book by Vernon Howard upon recommendation by a friend. I think I really needed it, so I took up the recommendation. After all, it's not true that everyone can cope with rejection as it comes. It's not something to be glorious about. But the real me doesn't think I should just cover it up as a vulnerable spot.
I'm just thinking over it. Although I'm trying not to think about the crisis for the moment. Really, I can't blame anyone, except for myself and how I controlled my emotions.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
If no one cheers me on...
It is always a challenge to scrape together my thoughts to cough up a reflection of my current life. Even more challenging is finding joy at the dull lack of milestones in my life. In contrast, the newspaper, which involve collective human experiences is much more interesting. Asking a girl out becomes a challenge, second to asking a friend out. Then there's always the basal dread of long-term commitments towards my goals and ambitions. I wonder why often, I inevitably find myself -freaking hell- worrying about today, and not enjoying my life to the fullest. Yes, I'm sulking here. My little hiding place.
Meanwhile, I have got things to do (On my own). I have gotten all too comfortable in my current life - it's easy to get depressed. If no one will encourage me on, at least I can conjure up an imaginary friend (light a match like the matchstick girl) that says with a little voice: "C'mon ZH, it's only a quarter in your life journey. You've GOT to pull up your socks!!"
Embrace your dreams. do not leave room for doubt
Meanwhile, I have got things to do (On my own). I have gotten all too comfortable in my current life - it's easy to get depressed. If no one will encourage me on, at least I can conjure up an imaginary friend (light a match like the matchstick girl) that says with a little voice: "C'mon ZH, it's only a quarter in your life journey. You've GOT to pull up your socks!!"
Embrace your dreams. do not leave room for doubt
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
it's funny, bcos sometimes i hate the text i'm just hammering right down.
I REALLY HATE MY STYLE OF WRITING. A read of past entries, just make me want to puke, vomit-blood, slap my thigh and laugh hysterically.
It's just the BLATANT LACK OF CAPS, and PHOTOS amid the sterile text. The text is lost, and longs to cling for the mother picture. The text is raw material that has no fixed form. It does not crawl to a Stop. It travels nowhere. And it suffers relentless abuse from your eye-gazing, your restless cursor - just stop - hovering - over me right now, or I'll - get angry. . . *there's no point in this entry*
and so it ends
I REALLY HATE MY STYLE OF WRITING. A read of past entries, just make me want to puke, vomit-blood, slap my thigh and laugh hysterically.
It's just the BLATANT LACK OF CAPS, and PHOTOS amid the sterile text. The text is lost, and longs to cling for the mother picture. The text is raw material that has no fixed form. It does not crawl to a Stop. It travels nowhere. And it suffers relentless abuse from your eye-gazing, your restless cursor - just stop - hovering - over me right now, or I'll - get angry. . . *there's no point in this entry*
and so it ends
Thursday, November 20, 2008
TOKYO!
Last evening, I watched TOKYO! a film of 3 shorts, Interior Design by Michel Gondry.
The first film held my attention considerably. It was about a young woman, whom under dire circumstances, gains the ability to turn into a chair. Driving outside in the rain, the female protagonist Hiroko with her director boyfriend are looking for a place to stay in Tokyo. They put up temporarily at her friend's small apartment. A series of pressurising events follow as they look for a place to stay with little success. The boyfriend takes up a gift-wrapping job to pay a parking fine, and meanwhile their car and filming equipment are towed away. After a screening of the film, Hiroko finds herself a liability as 'the girlfriend' as the boyfriend gets his shot at fame.
Merde was a rather eccentric film, showing how an eccentric character can inject mass mayhem onto the streets of Tokyo. This disgustingly foul, bearded man with a milky eye emerged from the sewers, walking in an uncharacteristic gait grabbing anything in his path. He was captured subsequently with draggy court proceedings. The effect on the masses were pro-merde and anti-merde groups that were reminiscent of human rights activists. And a possible sequel? Oh No!
Shaking Tokyo is about the life of a hikikomori and how he decides to go after a pizza end delivery girl one day, only to find out that she's another hikikomori. This strange subculture is explored in detail. I can't believe ppl can lead such sad, antisocial lives. And only in the advent of a disaster, such as an earthquake, be temporarily awakened to reality.
The first film held my attention considerably. It was about a young woman, whom under dire circumstances, gains the ability to turn into a chair. Driving outside in the rain, the female protagonist Hiroko with her director boyfriend are looking for a place to stay in Tokyo. They put up temporarily at her friend's small apartment. A series of pressurising events follow as they look for a place to stay with little success. The boyfriend takes up a gift-wrapping job to pay a parking fine, and meanwhile their car and filming equipment are towed away. After a screening of the film, Hiroko finds herself a liability as 'the girlfriend' as the boyfriend gets his shot at fame.
Merde was a rather eccentric film, showing how an eccentric character can inject mass mayhem onto the streets of Tokyo. This disgustingly foul, bearded man with a milky eye emerged from the sewers, walking in an uncharacteristic gait grabbing anything in his path. He was captured subsequently with draggy court proceedings. The effect on the masses were pro-merde and anti-merde groups that were reminiscent of human rights activists. And a possible sequel? Oh No!
Shaking Tokyo is about the life of a hikikomori and how he decides to go after a pizza end delivery girl one day, only to find out that she's another hikikomori. This strange subculture is explored in detail. I can't believe ppl can lead such sad, antisocial lives. And only in the advent of a disaster, such as an earthquake, be temporarily awakened to reality.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Viva la Vida (or what it actually means)
I am selectively lifting responses to the Coldplay lyric from the website: http://www.metrolyrics.com/viva-la-vida-lyrics-coldplay.html.
ouhhh (061008):
"Viva la vida" doesn't mean "Live your life" only. In fact "Viva la Vida" a Spanish phrase (I know it because I'm Spanish) also means "Go life!" I don't know how to express it correctly, but it is something like "life rocks!" or "C'mon Life", something like you are cheering the life, (using the personification literal expression)
I also think that this song is related to the french revolution basing on the album's cover, a painting in where we can see "Liberty" which is the most famous painting representing "french freedom"
I think that Coldplay is using this french revolution metaphor to express that it doesn't care how powerful you are or you think you are, because everyone has an end and for everyone there is a time where everything changes, and what can seem secure and unchangeable, of course it can turn around.
Like I've reflected before..
ouhhh (061008):
This song not about fear of not going to heaven or being turned down (its too optimistic), nor about any particular king or other ruler who lost his power.
First read the lyrics well, than hear the way he sings and read the title.
This song contains a story told by (kind of) a generalized case of human who believed that he has a power and did something that caused him being hurt and proven that the power was just an illusion. But the moral of the song is that after such a mental catastrophy, one should discover that ruling the world is not really necessary to have a good life and just enjoy the life. This is what the title says. Viva la vida means "live your life", be free and happy.
See what the fourth verse of the refrain starts with:
"And that was when I ruled the world" turns to "But that was when I ruled the world". 'But' is important because it suggests that the speaker no longer thinks the way he did before, he wants to separate himself from who he was before. He discovered that life is great without ruling the world and that is why he is singing so happily.
poliklosio (061008):
If you want to move on and relate the song to an average human's life, this is also a good metaphor of maturing, leaving the adolescense.
Crono (021008):
... this song is not about Napoleon. It's not about any particular factual ruler or king. He didn't "sweep the streets" of his own country, but died in exile on an island. This song is about the fall of a man that used to be on top of the world. It's not a Christian song or religious song by any means, but it is a song of a fallen leader. Napoleon is just one example, and this song could be applied to many throughout history and even some contemporary men that have fallen...
...the Saint Peter reference in the song is from a Catholic belief, not a Christian one (yes, there is a difference). No where in the Bible does it say that Peter is a gatekeeper in heaven. Even if he were to be one, he isn't one now, because he is "asleep" awaiting the resurrection of the righteous, as are all the other men and women who died in Christ.
gray7 (041008):
Never liked Coldplay which is confusingly me slightly as I love this song. Am a bit disturbed by the Christians claiming it though. Suspect the St Peter reference is ironic - he's not going to call any of our names as he doesn't exist - but Cronos is spot on about Napoleon. He might have woken up alone on Elba but he certainly wasn't sweeping the streets - were there any? - and Marie Antoinette ditto who was executed rather than put to some useful public service such as street sweeping. (Sorry, have a history degree. Know this stuff). Being a fellow Brit I suspect Mr Martin like most of us doesn't do God but likes his religious, historical and political references being a bit posh and very well educated. Got to go with the Cronos analysis that it's about someone who was on top and then screwed up. Ideally a short selling hedge fund manager who's now bankrupt. As James put it a decade ago: 'Now I've swung back down again it's worse than it was before. If I hadn't seen such riches I could live with being poor'!
***
It's nice to read how other people feel about songs in general (cryptic lyrics by RH seem to get everyone guessing). Lyrics shouldn't be taken too literally - like those romantic love songs. The way the lyrics are delivered in song breathes meaning into the overall message. Kudos to the reflections contributed by the above. I especially agreed with those points italicised. In my own interpretation (the video included), the song toys with the idea that fame, power, good things in our lives (and that of our lives) are transient - see the physical disintegration of the band members @ the end of the video - and one has to be prepared to be able to face bad times, when the tide turns.
Coldplay lyrics have been more subtle and comprehensible. I won't be surprised if Mrs Martin had a helping hand in the affair.
***
The most in-your-face Anti-Bush, Anti-War video. Politicians frolicking in fun, while the bloodletting is being carried out in the Middle-East. Very misleading though - that politicians lead good lives. Nobody wants to take on the role of the bad guy - but going by the train of rational thought, the war and occupation in Iraq is justifiable to liberate the oppressed people there. You can't just stand by the sidelines and ignore atrocities being carried out by tyrants, terrorist groups. Hence, being evil to eliminate a greater evil is justifiable, for the protection of personal interest and the maturity of mankind. What if celebrities that opposed war were asked to take on the Presidential term? They must know there are flipsides to the choice of peace. Rock bands should tone down their take on international politics, especially if they are not exposed to those kind of diplomatic relations 24/7. It's no easy job of responsibility, so of course letting your hair down is justifiable. This kind of anti-Bush propaganda is both defamatory and misleading, especially to those youth that are not well-read about international politics.. Mr Martin should use his fame responsibly to promote good causes, and not make any personal attacks.
Sunday, October 05, 2008
I had a dream I was in a nightmarish landscape. With black, dark clouds of apocalypse above me, but the sun still shone through in little specks. I could see the rays of the sun, yellow, orange, crimson lines that pierce the matter, the space, until it becomes uncertain, where the ray has travelled to, where the piercing end of the ray has touched. The light has illuminated two figures. Meanwhile, The strings played in the background, an apocalyptic tune on the minor key. change chord, gets higher up by a fifth (or a few tones). It was a picturesque landscape which wasn't original. It was extracted from an anime and the matrix. It was the setting for a major confrontation of two people who were close, but were in trying circumstances, that threaten to upset the balance of the world.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Expectations, Hopes & Fears.
The last word is in the negative sense that I would not dwell upon. ZH does not fear. He is invincible. at least he thinks he is.
Mounting 7d duty is f***ing crazy in every sense. Of course, not to say that we screw up on the job without fail. But the boredom and trepidation that follows with the expectation of 'what-if'. 'What if' something were to happen, that threatens the security of the base I'm guarding. 'What if' there was a bomb threat... 'What if' war broke out in the region. It IS a HEAVY WEIGHT to BEAR on your SHOULDERS. I feel tired as my work days is 7 days per week. I'm going to miss the Singapore Biennale, other activities, and I can't pursue weekend activities (e.g. studies or enrichment activities). I feel like a bird in a cage!
Then our superiors have high expectations of how we carry out our work. Seriously, how would you feel if the company is under-staffed and the hours are long? And on our resting days are organised live firing practices of outdated weapons, and over-strenuous Physical training with unrealistic expectations of your men. The cramming of our schedule on training days, in result, cheats us of our freedom to take leave.
Don't expect me to love thy unit and thy duty. Two words for you. F.. you....
Mounting 7d duty is f***ing crazy in every sense. Of course, not to say that we screw up on the job without fail. But the boredom and trepidation that follows with the expectation of 'what-if'. 'What if' something were to happen, that threatens the security of the base I'm guarding. 'What if' there was a bomb threat... 'What if' war broke out in the region. It IS a HEAVY WEIGHT to BEAR on your SHOULDERS. I feel tired as my work days is 7 days per week. I'm going to miss the Singapore Biennale, other activities, and I can't pursue weekend activities (e.g. studies or enrichment activities). I feel like a bird in a cage!
Then our superiors have high expectations of how we carry out our work. Seriously, how would you feel if the company is under-staffed and the hours are long? And on our resting days are organised live firing practices of outdated weapons, and over-strenuous Physical training with unrealistic expectations of your men. The cramming of our schedule on training days, in result, cheats us of our freedom to take leave.
Don't expect me to love thy unit and thy duty. Two words for you. F.. you....
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Proof ?
Sometimes I feel the army screws up your life big time. Especially in a 7d in-camp, then 4d training workday (8 to 5) system. It is seriously screwed up. My acapella group is in dissolution now. sigh. well, YT, never expected you to give me false hope.
While my mood is in a down, knowing that we might never meet again, it's hard to think positively... let me grieve pls...
hahahaha..... and n ow you see me smiling.
I know it's not the end. I tell myself it's not the end. It's just a phase. I know it ain't practical to schedule myself for this acapella thing too. It's too heavy on me. I know it's heavy for you guys too. So I'm not blaming anyone. Such is our fate. Would it be that we were best friends from the same choir, sharing the same dream in making music, popularising themes, and providing entertainment, and artistic insight to the masses. However, currently, my DREAM IS BUT A DROP OF FUEL FOR MY NIGHTMARE.
AND INSANITY TAKES FLIGHT!! =(
I KNOW..
I KNOW
I KNOW what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna run away from it all.
Running away from your troubles is the classic way. Each of us has to run down the mountain to meet our maker, like how we climbed up the mountain with our maker's blessings. (NOTICE I REFER TO GOD AS OUR MAKER)
I'm always thinking about GOD, the big question, because I want to know why I am here. AND I'M CERTAIN MY MAKER WAS INSTRUMENTAL IN THE CREATION OF LIFE (AND THE ARROGANT HUMAN RACE) - MOST OF US, GREW TOO PROUD FOR OURSELVES TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE ROOTS OF OUR HUMBLE ORIGINS. TO REFUTE THE EXISTENCE OF A MAKER WOULD BE FOOLISH, because an infinite existence of God (and the guises of other deities/immortals) are imperceptible to us living in the finite dimension. TO REFUTE THE EXISTENCE OF MIRACLES IS FOOLISH, FOR THERE IS MUCH WE DO NOT KNOW.
YET - YET - ONE IS INEVITABLY TRAPPED IN THE STRUGGLE OF FORCES THAT LEAD HUMANS ASTRAY FROM THE TRUTH, THEY SAY "SATAN" TRAPS MAN IN EVIL WAYS, AND GOD IS HOLINESS - GOODNESS, SHOWING THE TRUTH OF THE WORLD AND LIFESTYLE THAT MAN SHOULD LEAD.
Who can be sure? but there is definitely a God.. Don't expect me to believe atoms, the electrons, neutrons, and charges came from nowhere, from emptiness. Not wondrous ways, and not a miracle of God.
While my mood is in a down, knowing that we might never meet again, it's hard to think positively... let me grieve pls...
hahahaha..... and n ow you see me smiling.
I know it's not the end. I tell myself it's not the end. It's just a phase. I know it ain't practical to schedule myself for this acapella thing too. It's too heavy on me. I know it's heavy for you guys too. So I'm not blaming anyone. Such is our fate. Would it be that we were best friends from the same choir, sharing the same dream in making music, popularising themes, and providing entertainment, and artistic insight to the masses. However, currently, my DREAM IS BUT A DROP OF FUEL FOR MY NIGHTMARE.
AND INSANITY TAKES FLIGHT!! =(
I KNOW..
I KNOW
I KNOW what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna run away from it all.
Running away from your troubles is the classic way. Each of us has to run down the mountain to meet our maker, like how we climbed up the mountain with our maker's blessings. (NOTICE I REFER TO GOD AS OUR MAKER)
I'm always thinking about GOD, the big question, because I want to know why I am here. AND I'M CERTAIN MY MAKER WAS INSTRUMENTAL IN THE CREATION OF LIFE (AND THE ARROGANT HUMAN RACE) - MOST OF US, GREW TOO PROUD FOR OURSELVES TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE ROOTS OF OUR HUMBLE ORIGINS. TO REFUTE THE EXISTENCE OF A MAKER WOULD BE FOOLISH, because an infinite existence of God (and the guises of other deities/immortals) are imperceptible to us living in the finite dimension. TO REFUTE THE EXISTENCE OF MIRACLES IS FOOLISH, FOR THERE IS MUCH WE DO NOT KNOW.
YET - YET - ONE IS INEVITABLY TRAPPED IN THE STRUGGLE OF FORCES THAT LEAD HUMANS ASTRAY FROM THE TRUTH, THEY SAY "SATAN" TRAPS MAN IN EVIL WAYS, AND GOD IS HOLINESS - GOODNESS, SHOWING THE TRUTH OF THE WORLD AND LIFESTYLE THAT MAN SHOULD LEAD.
Who can be sure? but there is definitely a God.. Don't expect me to believe atoms, the electrons, neutrons, and charges came from nowhere, from emptiness. Not wondrous ways, and not a miracle of God.
Songs and Feelings
Reflecting on my current feelings, I feel my life ought to be documented into a novel. It may be a life like any other, filled with boring periods of individual reflection and studies. Yet there are fleeting, enjoyable moments of social activity that just leave me craving with an empty stomach when they're gone. I think I can identify myself in a mood-swing. One minute, I'm listening to the negative melodic metal band, the next, some dance track...... No. This could be a result of my reflex positive correction. In fact, I corrected myself positively, instead of letting my mind linger on the negative thoughts and songs.
Eureka! I realise I can change the way I think! Probably by simply choosing to be positive and stop dwelling on negative thoughts. I can be content with what I have, and stop thinking about that which is not mine. And you can play with your own mind, if you know what perks you up. Sometimes you just need to F***ING HELL WAKE UP YOUR IDEA!! =)
My dream's but a drop of fuel for a nightmare
The walls of night have left me scarred
the broken glass I stepped on, twice.
the ardent spirits' rusty edge, decapitate me...
Believe the dreams that let you sleep
the broken glass you need to sweep
The book you read; if you found an explanation
to help you in any way,
you are your own prison.
When I listen to metal, I often impose my personal anguish into it, typical of the song style. I use it as a medium to convey my emotions, otherwise repressed. I'm not saying it's a good thing. There's a limit to how far you should express them.
And now I'm listening to MISIA... in her eighth world album. feels like 7th heaven to me.
Eureka! I realise I can change the way I think! Probably by simply choosing to be positive and stop dwelling on negative thoughts. I can be content with what I have, and stop thinking about that which is not mine. And you can play with your own mind, if you know what perks you up. Sometimes you just need to F***ING HELL WAKE UP YOUR IDEA!! =)
My dream's but a drop of fuel for a nightmare
The walls of night have left me scarred
the broken glass I stepped on, twice.
the ardent spirits' rusty edge, decapitate me...
Believe the dreams that let you sleep
the broken glass you need to sweep
The book you read; if you found an explanation
to help you in any way,
you are your own prison.
When I listen to metal, I often impose my personal anguish into it, typical of the song style. I use it as a medium to convey my emotions, otherwise repressed. I'm not saying it's a good thing. There's a limit to how far you should express them.
And now I'm listening to MISIA... in her eighth world album. feels like 7th heaven to me.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
The trappings of the mind!!!
Review of Le Marche de Emperor (March of the Penguins).
Likes
1) Hallmark factual documentary on Penguin's mating season.
2) Showed the fact that Penguins behave in a similar fashion to humans. The viewer can empathise with the feelings of the animals.
3) Showed examples of reproductive successes and failures
4) Showed that Penguines are also prone to emotions (e.g. grief, joy of freedom)
Disliked
1) New-age lyrical music gives me the goosebumps.
2) Portrays Penguins' reproductive journey as quasi-religious, (which may for a fact be true).
3) The artificial scripts can be too imaginative sometimes.
4) Penguins' cry reminiscent of "The Call of the Ktulu" (Don't read that book.)
***
The Cola Wars (Modern Marvels)
http://www.surfthechannel.com/info/documentaries/Modern_Marvels/69139/13x43+The+Cola+Wars.html?aid=73911
***
Sometimes, I will have this unspeakable urge to write, because of the inability to convey my thoughts to anyone. My thoughts are always inadequate on the subject or incoherent to form a whole. And I know I seldom win in arguments, unless I have a deep conviction that I am right.
Oh Stranger, ignore the last three emo sentences addressed to thin air - myself.
WALL-E, the foolish robot falls for EVE. And is giving me a hard time playing the movie companion on my PSP. The scrap-collecting robot scoops up thrash, and compresses them into "junk-cubes". The junk cubes are stacked into towers. This in perspective, is hardly environmental-friendly, as the junk to be sorted is not returned back to the earth. Hence the desert wasteland, sandstorms. The name BNL (By 'n Large) Corporation which employs WALL-E robots, has an apt name for handling by-products and Bulky waste. At the rate we're using stuff, this is am ugly future we can anticipate
PALM OIL KILLS CHIMPS.. I'm seriously missing the environmental activist.
and Red Cliff is a good movie. I'm going to expand this post if I have time...
Likes
1) Hallmark factual documentary on Penguin's mating season.
2) Showed the fact that Penguins behave in a similar fashion to humans. The viewer can empathise with the feelings of the animals.
3) Showed examples of reproductive successes and failures
4) Showed that Penguines are also prone to emotions (e.g. grief, joy of freedom)
Disliked
1) New-age lyrical music gives me the goosebumps.
2) Portrays Penguins' reproductive journey as quasi-religious, (which may for a fact be true).
3) The artificial scripts can be too imaginative sometimes.
4) Penguins' cry reminiscent of "The Call of the Ktulu" (Don't read that book.)
***
The Cola Wars (Modern Marvels)
http://www.surfthechannel.com/info/documentaries/Modern_Marvels/69139/13x43+The+Cola+Wars.html?aid=73911
***
Sometimes, I will have this unspeakable urge to write, because of the inability to convey my thoughts to anyone. My thoughts are always inadequate on the subject or incoherent to form a whole. And I know I seldom win in arguments, unless I have a deep conviction that I am right.
Oh Stranger, ignore the last three emo sentences addressed to thin air - myself.
WALL-E, the foolish robot falls for EVE. And is giving me a hard time playing the movie companion on my PSP. The scrap-collecting robot scoops up thrash, and compresses them into "junk-cubes". The junk cubes are stacked into towers. This in perspective, is hardly environmental-friendly, as the junk to be sorted is not returned back to the earth. Hence the desert wasteland, sandstorms. The name BNL (By 'n Large) Corporation which employs WALL-E robots, has an apt name for handling by-products and Bulky waste. At the rate we're using stuff, this is am ugly future we can anticipate
PALM OIL KILLS CHIMPS.. I'm seriously missing the environmental activist.
and Red Cliff is a good movie. I'm going to expand this post if I have time...
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Allegiance to myself
The other day I was just ranting about the Christian culture in Singapore. But I picked up a nugget in my subconscious mind that says, "no more". In which Jesus said to his disciple, who attacked the Roman soldiers, that there will be no more of this (bloodshed). The nugget has profound meaning in context that we can explore. To me, it means if you see evil being carried out, you will choose not to endorse it, and - going one step further - do everything in your power to bring about the triumph of good over evil.
Most of us have an idea what evil is. Satan is the embodiment of evil (ie. endorses evil deeds). To choose to sin (do bad deeds) is falling under the influence of evil. Satan is not something to be feared, but to be despised.
I relate to this while making my choices over matters. 21 years of age has increased the stakes and responsibilities over making choices. I hope this wisdom never leaves me, that I would still be in touch with God, or an inner sense of righteousness, in my darkest hour.
* * *
Videos that have reallly mind-f*ed me. The vulgar term we soldiers use, means playing with your mind. these are the life-changing videos that have been making me think about universal accountability.
1. The movie "Ironman"
2. www.storyofstuff.com
3. Youtube - Overfishing
4. TED's Silicon Valley CEO Global Warming talk
5. TED's British Scientist on Longevity (how to cure Ageing)
6. International Academy of Lymphology
7. Night talk with Dr Willie Smiths on Red Orangutans
I'm not fully buying some of this stuff. Because they have made me raise eyebrows many times.
I tried to recall the exclusive afternoon talk by Sydney Brenner 2 years ago... I'm sure I still have notes. That's all.
Most of us have an idea what evil is. Satan is the embodiment of evil (ie. endorses evil deeds). To choose to sin (do bad deeds) is falling under the influence of evil. Satan is not something to be feared, but to be despised.
I relate to this while making my choices over matters. 21 years of age has increased the stakes and responsibilities over making choices. I hope this wisdom never leaves me, that I would still be in touch with God, or an inner sense of righteousness, in my darkest hour.
* * *
Videos that have reallly mind-f*ed me. The vulgar term we soldiers use, means playing with your mind. these are the life-changing videos that have been making me think about universal accountability.
1. The movie "Ironman"
2. www.storyofstuff.com
3. Youtube - Overfishing
4. TED's Silicon Valley CEO Global Warming talk
5. TED's British Scientist on Longevity (how to cure Ageing)
6. International Academy of Lymphology
7. Night talk with Dr Willie Smiths on Red Orangutans
I'm not fully buying some of this stuff. Because they have made me raise eyebrows many times.
I tried to recall the exclusive afternoon talk by Sydney Brenner 2 years ago... I'm sure I still have notes. That's all.
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Arcangelo Corelli
CONCERTO GROSSO IN D, OP. 6/1 (3): LARGOORCH. OF THE AGE OF ENLIGHTENMENT CATHERINE MACKINTOSH (c)
*Love* - the sombre intensity of that baroque violin piece... Listening to Symphony 92.4 FM is like falling in love many times over. (-: <3 The violin weeps pure emotion.
and follow-up to it:
Louis Spohr
DOUBLE QRT NO. 3 IN E MINOR, OP. 87 (2) ACADEMY OF ST MARTIN- I(N THE FIELDS)
wasn't half-bad. Justsounded like a suitable complement to the violin in the previous..
It becomes increasingly difficult for me to escape the trappings of my mind... Yet as the mind wanders astray, it only revolves around me in an orbit.. Was it ever necessary for one's relationship with God to be one of everlasting worship?
Young Christians seem to be enforcing their own assumptions about God, whom in their idea, is ever-pleased with their weekly tributes of hour-long rock concerts... It's increasingly difficult to accept the shades of gray in which they see as the norm; and the different personalities around you threatening to recruit you as one of them. I would imagine myself, surrounded by a huge strawberry jelly syrup. Although sweet it may be, and nutritious, once you are swallowed inside - you become one of them, another collective in the Jelly.
I can't deny the openness of my heart only tinges with suspicion, when the pastor makes us repeat stuff in a collective (frightening) manner - but well, proves that we are a social group and none of us is alone. It makes me kind of freaked o ut sometimes, but I know that I'm not losing myself. Hence, now, supposedly in line with my objectives, I'll set forth from my nest again, knowing that when I feel weak, I could always immerse myself in the nurturing environment of church. It's practical, but selfish of me.
I'm reading Chp 3 of The Food Revolution -- on the environment.
Monday, June 16, 2008
The Lonely One*
*Taken from TIME magazine
Dag Hammarskjöld was a man almost nobody knew. His diary, Markings, published three years after his death (TIME, Oct. 23, 1964), surprised even his close associates, for it showed that the brilliant economist, banker, and Secretary-General of the U.N. was a mystical man, unfathomed during his lifetime, constantly tortured by self-doubt and despair.
*Taken from TIME magazine
Dag Hammarskjöld was a man almost nobody knew. His diary, Markings, published three years after his death (TIME, Oct. 23, 1964), surprised even his close associates, for it showed that the brilliant economist, banker, and Secretary-General of the U.N. was a mystical man, unfathomed during his lifetime, constantly tortured by self-doubt and despair.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Divided Opinion
An assimilation of information from 1) people offering their opinions, 2) interviews with friends.
People who tell me they don't believe - that's your problem! Now, don't try to sway my opinion.
I suppose, if I have a lot of friends that believe, I would tend to think I'm not alone. But thanks to YT, who says, "Don't follow the crowd, you'd know better than that...." (in referral to my regret at studying a Diploma in Biotechnology, because the Minister recommended it) And I relate it to the pastor who mentioned the whispers in the crowd, that were driven from the amazement of Jesus' miracles. The question is, whether YT is part of the crowd, that I choose not to listen to. Perhaps my brother and those advising me to consider carefully taking up Christianity as my religion are the whispers in the crowd.
YT, it's almost unnatural, but sometimes, I wonder if I feel a rush of love for what you are doing for me. No matter how remote or minute your actions are, I am at least 50% under your influence. And you can say I trust you, not merely because we're friends, but because what you've revealed to me recently regarding saving our planet and environment - makes a whole lot of sense to me - and I feel it's only right for us, as stewards, to contribute not to the destruction of our planet, but provide upkeep, and promote the awareness of the state of our planet.
Not just YT though. My friend's mom, she's advising me on her multi-religious Buddhist cocktail spanning the prophets of various religions - i.e. Jesus Christ, Prophet Mohammed, Siddharta Bodhivista (that Buddha guy), Confucious, Mother Guan Yin - all being messengers of the same God. And hence there is still only one GOD, and Unright of Christians to claim God - or the biblical scriptures, fragments of God's word - for themself. And she's taught me several aspects of being vegetarian. That we can expect a more peaceful death in the coming. That the prayers you devote yourself in worship, are not needed, and do little, by being vaguely mystical, too mysterious.
A Vandread philosophy brought out the thought that: God doesn't want anything of us, we've been created by God because he loves us, not for us to make sacrifices in the form of offerings. I reflected in reality: "not for us to devote too much time to worship him. But to spend time to bear fruit."
***
The culture of Youth Impact - Youth for Christ - is sporting and fun. I've just been called to attend one of their activities, that might last 8 hours. Now, Come to think of someone who's just taking their break from a mounting week. I am seeking some time for solace. I can't do this. Right now, I just want to say, I can't do this. Succumb to peer pressure, I may, this time. I'm just hoping that someone who cares is listening. If God won't listen, if Jesus Christ won't listen, I hope someone does.
7 days on duty, putting my duty @ first priority, taking in criticism and scathing criticism - I'm sick and tired of doing what I have to do. I need some quality me time.
I want to absorb the good qualities of others, and banish my vices. And that's maybe why I go to church.
People who tell me they don't believe - that's your problem! Now, don't try to sway my opinion.
I suppose, if I have a lot of friends that believe, I would tend to think I'm not alone. But thanks to YT, who says, "Don't follow the crowd, you'd know better than that...." (in referral to my regret at studying a Diploma in Biotechnology, because the Minister recommended it) And I relate it to the pastor who mentioned the whispers in the crowd, that were driven from the amazement of Jesus' miracles. The question is, whether YT is part of the crowd, that I choose not to listen to. Perhaps my brother and those advising me to consider carefully taking up Christianity as my religion are the whispers in the crowd.
YT, it's almost unnatural, but sometimes, I wonder if I feel a rush of love for what you are doing for me. No matter how remote or minute your actions are, I am at least 50% under your influence. And you can say I trust you, not merely because we're friends, but because what you've revealed to me recently regarding saving our planet and environment - makes a whole lot of sense to me - and I feel it's only right for us, as stewards, to contribute not to the destruction of our planet, but provide upkeep, and promote the awareness of the state of our planet.
Not just YT though. My friend's mom, she's advising me on her multi-religious Buddhist cocktail spanning the prophets of various religions - i.e. Jesus Christ, Prophet Mohammed, Siddharta Bodhivista (that Buddha guy), Confucious, Mother Guan Yin - all being messengers of the same God. And hence there is still only one GOD, and Unright of Christians to claim God - or the biblical scriptures, fragments of God's word - for themself. And she's taught me several aspects of being vegetarian. That we can expect a more peaceful death in the coming. That the prayers you devote yourself in worship, are not needed, and do little, by being vaguely mystical, too mysterious.
A Vandread philosophy brought out the thought that: God doesn't want anything of us, we've been created by God because he loves us, not for us to make sacrifices in the form of offerings. I reflected in reality: "not for us to devote too much time to worship him. But to spend time to bear fruit."
***
The culture of Youth Impact - Youth for Christ - is sporting and fun. I've just been called to attend one of their activities, that might last 8 hours. Now, Come to think of someone who's just taking their break from a mounting week. I am seeking some time for solace. I can't do this. Right now, I just want to say, I can't do this. Succumb to peer pressure, I may, this time. I'm just hoping that someone who cares is listening. If God won't listen, if Jesus Christ won't listen, I hope someone does.
7 days on duty, putting my duty @ first priority, taking in criticism and scathing criticism - I'm sick and tired of doing what I have to do. I need some quality me time.
I want to absorb the good qualities of others, and banish my vices. And that's maybe why I go to church.
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Questions
A general restlessness stirs me every now and then.
Could this be it - ?
1. Getting involved in Christianity (serving a greater cause, and securing a way to heaven)?
Humbling myself to the higher order, acknowledging the presence of a Creator; and dropping all my egos and pretenses in front of others; my arrogance... as a mere man... destined for... worship. I wish I could... but I can't do it. I'm too arrogant to humble myself. It makes me vulnerable and insecure.
And if you are turning away from Church, means you are turning away from God? And away from God you go, to the Clutches of Satan? God wants you to make a choice, but it seems like a rhetoric, if the God's word in Christianity is the only accepted one as truth. I do not wish to believe that Buddhists, Catholics, Hindus, Moslems, Taoists are under the influence of Satan. It's part of the convenant made with God to see the world in his word.
"There shall be no other Gods before you"
I admit my reasons for going to Church are inclusive of secondary ones, like forging friendships or social connections, ridding the loneliness that gnaws in the empty spaces of the mind.
Somehow though, reading the bible has such lasting effect, it makes me ponder aloud in my mind, seeming as if God was really talking to me : "Oh ye, of little faith..." Yet I wish it wouldn't be so artificial sometimes, I wish I didn't analyse things and say.. oh, you know, that's because you've read it, and it triggered a response of thought that goes along those lines.. I wish God would prove himself to me and show me the right way, rather than subject me to the trial of choosing among religions. This overzealous worship, I feel sometimes, might be exactly what it is. I am filled with doubt during service - does all worship and prayers make one wholesome enough to adopt an insulation attitude towards one's work? I wish they would just cut down on the worship, cause I don't believe God is an Emperor, who fills heaven with riches, and enjoys hearing the worship session while people and animals on earth Are Suffering. and look we're just doing nothing-but-singing in the meantime and pouring our minds into prayers... In my current level of faith, I'm not convinced.
James, you said that the process to becoming a Christian was a gradual transformation. I agree, I've actually changed parts of my thinking because of God's word. However, I find it hard to agree with some of the things that Christians do. It might not be a lifetime relationship of Church visits for me.
2. Getting involved in being Vegetarian (and join the Buddha group)?
3. Applying for a Diploma in Mass Communication (dreams to be one of the writers for our daily newspaper)?
4. Sticking by my Acapella group through thick and thin (dreaming of glamour, rather than creating cool, heartfelt music?)
5. Forgetting about tinkering with musical instruments?
6. Buying the correct DVD... and making all the other choices.. Dear me.
Could this be it - ?
1. Getting involved in Christianity (serving a greater cause, and securing a way to heaven)?
Humbling myself to the higher order, acknowledging the presence of a Creator; and dropping all my egos and pretenses in front of others; my arrogance... as a mere man... destined for... worship. I wish I could... but I can't do it. I'm too arrogant to humble myself. It makes me vulnerable and insecure.
And if you are turning away from Church, means you are turning away from God? And away from God you go, to the Clutches of Satan? God wants you to make a choice, but it seems like a rhetoric, if the God's word in Christianity is the only accepted one as truth. I do not wish to believe that Buddhists, Catholics, Hindus, Moslems, Taoists are under the influence of Satan. It's part of the convenant made with God to see the world in his word.
"There shall be no other Gods before you"
I admit my reasons for going to Church are inclusive of secondary ones, like forging friendships or social connections, ridding the loneliness that gnaws in the empty spaces of the mind.
Somehow though, reading the bible has such lasting effect, it makes me ponder aloud in my mind, seeming as if God was really talking to me : "Oh ye, of little faith..." Yet I wish it wouldn't be so artificial sometimes, I wish I didn't analyse things and say.. oh, you know, that's because you've read it, and it triggered a response of thought that goes along those lines.. I wish God would prove himself to me and show me the right way, rather than subject me to the trial of choosing among religions. This overzealous worship, I feel sometimes, might be exactly what it is. I am filled with doubt during service - does all worship and prayers make one wholesome enough to adopt an insulation attitude towards one's work? I wish they would just cut down on the worship, cause I don't believe God is an Emperor, who fills heaven with riches, and enjoys hearing the worship session while people and animals on earth Are Suffering. and look we're just doing nothing-but-singing in the meantime and pouring our minds into prayers... In my current level of faith, I'm not convinced.
James, you said that the process to becoming a Christian was a gradual transformation. I agree, I've actually changed parts of my thinking because of God's word. However, I find it hard to agree with some of the things that Christians do. It might not be a lifetime relationship of Church visits for me.
2. Getting involved in being Vegetarian (and join the Buddha group)?
3. Applying for a Diploma in Mass Communication (dreams to be one of the writers for our daily newspaper)?
4. Sticking by my Acapella group through thick and thin (dreaming of glamour, rather than creating cool, heartfelt music?)
5. Forgetting about tinkering with musical instruments?
6. Buying the correct DVD... and making all the other choices.. Dear me.
Thursday, May 01, 2008
A dangerous way to live...
even during NS life, the prospect of not stock-taking at the end of each day is growing on me. I find myself simply waiting for the duty week to pass... And this is a dangerous way to live - or to waste your life. The protagonist in Norwegian Wood is about a good-for-nothing (as far as halfway through the book), who has wasted half of his life as a drifter, unable to get up after a hard fall.
Who knows, sooner or later, I might be regrettably found dead in an accident. No need to repress the thought - it is a possibility that can happen to anyone. Say when higher forces have grown tired of you, and decide it's time to chuck your piece off the chessboard... And when the time comes to die, I should be ready - to have found myself leading a fulfilled life, on very personal terms of course.
Anyway, those were some of the thoughts animals might have if they were domesticated, then one day sent to the slaughterhouse. After reading Diet for a New America, I felt cheated all my life, being shown only half the facts of our association with the animal-kingdom and mother nature. The meat taken from a dead animal, now looks grotesque and monstrous to touch, not to mention feed. What a sacrifice the animals were put into. In Robbin's words, "Eating should be a pleasurable activity" and not one tainted by blood and suffering of a fellow living being. The conscience is now crying out at me. Poor creatures. They are aware, they are intelligent, and they are suffering - just that we can't speak their language. And it's tough now our tyranny in factory farming, cattle ranching, and meat campaigns will bring about the planet's demise.
Who knows, sooner or later, I might be regrettably found dead in an accident. No need to repress the thought - it is a possibility that can happen to anyone. Say when higher forces have grown tired of you, and decide it's time to chuck your piece off the chessboard... And when the time comes to die, I should be ready - to have found myself leading a fulfilled life, on very personal terms of course.
Anyway, those were some of the thoughts animals might have if they were domesticated, then one day sent to the slaughterhouse. After reading Diet for a New America, I felt cheated all my life, being shown only half the facts of our association with the animal-kingdom and mother nature. The meat taken from a dead animal, now looks grotesque and monstrous to touch, not to mention feed. What a sacrifice the animals were put into. In Robbin's words, "Eating should be a pleasurable activity" and not one tainted by blood and suffering of a fellow living being. The conscience is now crying out at me. Poor creatures. They are aware, they are intelligent, and they are suffering - just that we can't speak their language. And it's tough now our tyranny in factory farming, cattle ranching, and meat campaigns will bring about the planet's demise.
Monday, April 21, 2008
maybe I shouldn't read the Murakami novels. The content explored in these novels are, though heartfelt, far too frivolous. It's just like reading Maxim.
Have you ever wondered if you were ready for death?
It's not a case of suicidal thoughts, but the stream of events playing into your consciousness seem far too smooth to be real. It's too predictable... this life here in Singapore. We're viable bacteria growing at the centre of the colony, far too sheltered from external influences in the culture medium. But if the world ends, our single-cell biological system will be plunged into chaos first...
Damn. A single thought gives rise to a rapid succession of thoughts. You can sense the disorientation in my analogies.
I am going to need some good reading material and I need to stick to my goals. Out.
Have you ever wondered if you were ready for death?
It's not a case of suicidal thoughts, but the stream of events playing into your consciousness seem far too smooth to be real. It's too predictable... this life here in Singapore. We're viable bacteria growing at the centre of the colony, far too sheltered from external influences in the culture medium. But if the world ends, our single-cell biological system will be plunged into chaos first...
Damn. A single thought gives rise to a rapid succession of thoughts. You can sense the disorientation in my analogies.
I am going to need some good reading material and I need to stick to my goals. Out.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Traumatised
Really traumatised just now. Me, James and Khong Guan, were walking to the Bus-stop along Bukit Timah Road, gazing at the monkeys.
"Look, monkeys!" I can't remembered who said that.
"Oh how cute" -- Yeah, I'm a guy who says such things. Really, they looked amiable.
The grey brown creatures were playing on the greeny slope on the side of the road. As we passed by, they stopped to gaze at us, and us at them. Khong Guan took out his camera handphone.
"Damn, can't take a good shot... can't focus..."
"Don't take pictures of them! Last time one of 'em was on the railing... chased me and almost clawed me." said James.
Two young girls of secondary school age were walking towards us from the opposite direction. One of them was taking pictures of the monkey ahead with a black camera handphone.
Khong Guan carries on taking pictures, while we stood there and eyeballed the monkey of interest.
"I wish I could take video..."
We walked over to the next monkey, while the girls had just passed behind us. The monkey sat there sitting on the slope, behind a small broken branch, facing us. Another monkey ahead of us made a sudden movement that grabbed our attention. With a few bounds, it leapt swiftly over to the sitting monkey, turned him/her around, stood up, and grabbed the first monkey's ass to reveal a pink strip of flesh, and started a movement that seemed like he was thrusting energetically into the monkey's backside.
This continued over a few seconds, as we gaped in shock. The monkey stopped as sudden as he started, and turned around to look at us. I was observing in distaste. It had completely dissolved the cuteness in monkey appreciation, and completely ruined my impression of the monkeys.
"Ee... Look what the monkey is doing.."
I looked back the path we had travelled from to see the two girls observing the monkeys now, with curious interest. I think I had urged the others to walked on. It was barbaric, and absolutely disgusting..
"See, ZH, they are not as pure and innocent as you think they are. That monkey was smiling as he did it" James chuckled. James was telling me that the first monkey is a male.
Omg.. it's so R21... I thought.
Horny monkeys. Gay horny monkeys... *shudder*
"Look, monkeys!" I can't remembered who said that.
"Oh how cute" -- Yeah, I'm a guy who says such things. Really, they looked amiable.
The grey brown creatures were playing on the greeny slope on the side of the road. As we passed by, they stopped to gaze at us, and us at them. Khong Guan took out his camera handphone.
"Damn, can't take a good shot... can't focus..."
"Don't take pictures of them! Last time one of 'em was on the railing... chased me and almost clawed me." said James.
Two young girls of secondary school age were walking towards us from the opposite direction. One of them was taking pictures of the monkey ahead with a black camera handphone.
Khong Guan carries on taking pictures, while we stood there and eyeballed the monkey of interest.
"I wish I could take video..."
We walked over to the next monkey, while the girls had just passed behind us. The monkey sat there sitting on the slope, behind a small broken branch, facing us. Another monkey ahead of us made a sudden movement that grabbed our attention. With a few bounds, it leapt swiftly over to the sitting monkey, turned him/her around, stood up, and grabbed the first monkey's ass to reveal a pink strip of flesh, and started a movement that seemed like he was thrusting energetically into the monkey's backside.
This continued over a few seconds, as we gaped in shock. The monkey stopped as sudden as he started, and turned around to look at us. I was observing in distaste. It had completely dissolved the cuteness in monkey appreciation, and completely ruined my impression of the monkeys.
"Ee... Look what the monkey is doing.."
I looked back the path we had travelled from to see the two girls observing the monkeys now, with curious interest. I think I had urged the others to walked on. It was barbaric, and absolutely disgusting..
"See, ZH, they are not as pure and innocent as you think they are. That monkey was smiling as he did it" James chuckled. James was telling me that the first monkey is a male.
Omg.. it's so R21... I thought.
Horny monkeys. Gay horny monkeys... *shudder*
Genesis?
how did the universe began?
Science pin-points it to the big bang, ultimately, which began time in the universe. From what I understand, a rapid expansion, from which shot out the worlds that would become. Then physics explains, there were stars that burned the fuel of creation. There was gravity, which might have played a role in the process. And the stars burned to breathe life to the dancing matter in space.
An even more abstract - In the beginning, there was light. And certainly nothing further we need to know, or question? We'll take a break for commercial dialogue...
A: Hallo Bravo! Good day to you. How do you do?
B: ... Good day to you, Alpha. Rise and shine, the weather is fine...
A: ... (at loss for words)
B: ...
A: Say what do you think of the TV programme just now?
B: ... Well, it was interesting. (scowl) It talked about the creation of the universe...
A: I like totally agree with the scientific explanation dude. Stephen Hawking, that guy, had it all explained in a documentary, about the nature of the big bang, you know - it's a grand shebang in science? Haha!
B: ... Yeah, that's quite true.. But I beg to differ...
A: Why? Let's hear your thoughts.
B: ... From what I know, God created the world in six days and rested on the seventh day...
A: ... (frowns and raises questioning eyebrow)
B: ... Yeah
A: ... (hesitates, and begins slowly) God said in the beginning there was light.
B: Uh-huh.
A: ... Well, I don't think that is the case. For in the beginning, there was probably darkness, before the stars came out!
B: ... (snorts) You are making an assumption of somebody turning on the room light switch while you're resting in bed in the middle of the night. That is a wholly human assumption. This is the universe we are talking about here.
A: ... Okay, okay! Then how can you be certain what darkness is if there wasn't light in the first place?
B: ... Maybe there has always been light in the universe, as far as anyone can tell.
A: ... If there wasn't light, there wouldn't be darkness.
B: ... but the converse is not true.
B: I tell you, the big-bang is way overrated.. What of the big-bang? Many compressed particles simply drifted and suddenly charge towards each other head on, with extreme impunity. Kamikaze! and BOOM!...
A: ...
B: ... Ah... my point is what gave rise to the Big-bang? There has to be a director behind this epic movie.
A: ... We refer to him as the Creator.
B: Aye, the Lord God, Kami! The creator. The Lord God made them all.
A: All creatures great and small... (completes)
B: ....
B: Hmm... The moment we come to this world, we are borned into light. The light of the sun. It says of our world, but not of the universe.
A: I'm not sure. What are the chances?
B: (frowns) In the beginning..
A: ... there was light... (finishes)
A: ... because there wasn't a need in the bible to give a damn about darkness.
B: ... Really?
A: ... Yeah, probably. God doesn't need to let us know all of his intricate thoughts, or we'll be so disturbed, we'll stray from the path and purpose he originally intended for us, for our lives.
B: ... So that is why people are so troubled when we play with our human genes...
A: ... No, that's not true. God intended to make them play with genes... We are smart, in God's image. Maybe he wanted us to become responsible and mature enough, and that it would mean no harm to his plans.
B: ... And we're just subjected to the fates and destinies of the Almighty, huh?
A: ... Yeah. Big-Big Brother is watching.
B: ...
I've gotta read Sophie's world again and find the answer to that question. It's slipping away from my memory. And sad thing is, things are preventing me from being 100% good at studying. Oh.. I want to taste the fruit of knowledge.
Science pin-points it to the big bang, ultimately, which began time in the universe. From what I understand, a rapid expansion, from which shot out the worlds that would become. Then physics explains, there were stars that burned the fuel of creation. There was gravity, which might have played a role in the process. And the stars burned to breathe life to the dancing matter in space.
An even more abstract - In the beginning, there was light. And certainly nothing further we need to know, or question? We'll take a break for commercial dialogue...
A: Hallo Bravo! Good day to you. How do you do?
B: ... Good day to you, Alpha. Rise and shine, the weather is fine...
A: ... (at loss for words)
B: ...
A: Say what do you think of the TV programme just now?
B: ... Well, it was interesting. (scowl) It talked about the creation of the universe...
A: I like totally agree with the scientific explanation dude. Stephen Hawking, that guy, had it all explained in a documentary, about the nature of the big bang, you know - it's a grand shebang in science? Haha!
B: ... Yeah, that's quite true.. But I beg to differ...
A: Why? Let's hear your thoughts.
B: ... From what I know, God created the world in six days and rested on the seventh day...
A: ... (frowns and raises questioning eyebrow)
B: ... Yeah
A: ... (hesitates, and begins slowly) God said in the beginning there was light.
B: Uh-huh.
A: ... Well, I don't think that is the case. For in the beginning, there was probably darkness, before the stars came out!
B: ... (snorts) You are making an assumption of somebody turning on the room light switch while you're resting in bed in the middle of the night. That is a wholly human assumption. This is the universe we are talking about here.
A: ... Okay, okay! Then how can you be certain what darkness is if there wasn't light in the first place?
B: ... Maybe there has always been light in the universe, as far as anyone can tell.
A: ... If there wasn't light, there wouldn't be darkness.
B: ... but the converse is not true.
B: I tell you, the big-bang is way overrated.. What of the big-bang? Many compressed particles simply drifted and suddenly charge towards each other head on, with extreme impunity. Kamikaze! and BOOM!...
A: ...
B: ... Ah... my point is what gave rise to the Big-bang? There has to be a director behind this epic movie.
A: ... We refer to him as the Creator.
B: Aye, the Lord God, Kami! The creator. The Lord God made them all.
A: All creatures great and small... (completes)
B: ....
B: Hmm... The moment we come to this world, we are borned into light. The light of the sun. It says of our world, but not of the universe.
A: I'm not sure. What are the chances?
B: (frowns) In the beginning..
A: ... there was light... (finishes)
A: ... because there wasn't a need in the bible to give a damn about darkness.
B: ... Really?
A: ... Yeah, probably. God doesn't need to let us know all of his intricate thoughts, or we'll be so disturbed, we'll stray from the path and purpose he originally intended for us, for our lives.
B: ... So that is why people are so troubled when we play with our human genes...
A: ... No, that's not true. God intended to make them play with genes... We are smart, in God's image. Maybe he wanted us to become responsible and mature enough, and that it would mean no harm to his plans.
B: ... And we're just subjected to the fates and destinies of the Almighty, huh?
A: ... Yeah. Big-Big Brother is watching.
B: ...
I've gotta read Sophie's world again and find the answer to that question. It's slipping away from my memory. And sad thing is, things are preventing me from being 100% good at studying. Oh.. I want to taste the fruit of knowledge.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Afutadaku
This morning, Shir0i informed me about the prospect of receiving notice, the outcome of my application into two of Singapore's major Universities. Yes, after two months of wait, or 5 duty cycles, I was finally going to know what the hell was I destined for, or where I might be going after my mediocre stint in National Service. I have little optimism regarding the outcome - I can't tell you right now.
I just feel damn old now, because I realise, I'm turning twenty-one this year. It's just so traumatic I need to join a social support group. =(
Throughout my 7 days of isolation into a particular society of males (no complaint about them), I expressed a dire need to stay in touch with my inner soul, and my life's goals. Thanks to YT, I am actively in pursuit of my own well-being. I am learning how to prepare good chicken soup by working hard and being good to myself. If there was ever such a proverb. I believe I'm slowly being led to my destiny. =)
I swear I am still hearing and singing J.S. Bach's "Nunn komm der Heidan Heilandt" in my head, or in the shower. A tune I downloaded from choir 3 years ago, as a result of over-practising. I sort of do it to impress friends, that I'm a dramatic choir boy. So now I ask my choir director... Reuben.. what have you done to me??? =_="""
my bike - or my brother's bike - is now a speed monster. The gear shifter has been changed to quality cable from the low quality cable that came with it. I received some tips from the bike repair mechanic in Song Seng Choon with gear-changing. The tyres have been pumped full after the mechanic found the tyres to be soft.
I read that Singapore has ambitions to become a academic melting-pot. I scowled at the offending article on a page in TODAY. Sg - IS - a melting pot, thanks to the pressure put on by the hungry Chinese students. But I guess this is universal in Asia, after accessing sources (Jigoku Shoujo [anime] and After Dark by Murakami) that indicate life in Japan is similar, with obsessions with grades.. and etc.
I'll end this post prematurely because I'm heading off to claim my pair of spectacles for another seven days of camping. Alright. Drop the angsty show already. >_<
* * *
After Dark is a novel by Haruhi Murakami, translated from Japanese by Jay Rubin. The novel describes the lives of a city's inhabitants after the night falls. A Varsity school-girl Mari, faces problems of her own and decides to stay out for the night. She meets the musician Takahashi, and they both ensue in dialogue, culminating in a series of events so that their problems are solved. This is really the abstract. Murakami works his magic with prose, by describing the problem through the surrealistic cum eerie view of, say a camera lens, and our reflections trapped behind the mirror. It is still full of mystery and wonder, when we revisit the book. Just don't think of RINGU beforehand.. Memories from that unrelated movie sends serious chills down my spine.
I just feel damn old now, because I realise, I'm turning twenty-one this year. It's just so traumatic I need to join a social support group. =(
Throughout my 7 days of isolation into a particular society of males (no complaint about them), I expressed a dire need to stay in touch with my inner soul, and my life's goals. Thanks to YT, I am actively in pursuit of my own well-being. I am learning how to prepare good chicken soup by working hard and being good to myself. If there was ever such a proverb. I believe I'm slowly being led to my destiny. =)
I swear I am still hearing and singing J.S. Bach's "Nunn komm der Heidan Heilandt" in my head, or in the shower. A tune I downloaded from choir 3 years ago, as a result of over-practising. I sort of do it to impress friends, that I'm a dramatic choir boy. So now I ask my choir director... Reuben.. what have you done to me??? =_="""
my bike - or my brother's bike - is now a speed monster. The gear shifter has been changed to quality cable from the low quality cable that came with it. I received some tips from the bike repair mechanic in Song Seng Choon with gear-changing. The tyres have been pumped full after the mechanic found the tyres to be soft.
I read that Singapore has ambitions to become a academic melting-pot. I scowled at the offending article on a page in TODAY. Sg - IS - a melting pot, thanks to the pressure put on by the hungry Chinese students. But I guess this is universal in Asia, after accessing sources (Jigoku Shoujo [anime] and After Dark by Murakami) that indicate life in Japan is similar, with obsessions with grades.. and etc.
I'll end this post prematurely because I'm heading off to claim my pair of spectacles for another seven days of camping. Alright. Drop the angsty show already. >_<
* * *
After Dark is a novel by Haruhi Murakami, translated from Japanese by Jay Rubin. The novel describes the lives of a city's inhabitants after the night falls. A Varsity school-girl Mari, faces problems of her own and decides to stay out for the night. She meets the musician Takahashi, and they both ensue in dialogue, culminating in a series of events so that their problems are solved. This is really the abstract. Murakami works his magic with prose, by describing the problem through the surrealistic cum eerie view of, say a camera lens, and our reflections trapped behind the mirror. It is still full of mystery and wonder, when we revisit the book. Just don't think of RINGU beforehand.. Memories from that unrelated movie sends serious chills down my spine.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
(something)-youbi
I cooked up a convoluted story, inspired by a certain language (I'm not mocking The Bible's Genesis).
月曜日
On Monday..
a pale Moon hung over the evening sky
shining a path for Man in the wilderness.
火曜日
On Tuesday..
Man discovered Fire
and inevitably burns himself in the process.
水曜日
On Wednesday..
Man bathed in Water
to treat his burns and refresh himself.
木曜日
On Thursday..
Man collected Wood
to keep himself safe and warm.
金曜日
On Friday..
Man discovered a piece of Gold...
for which he used for designing his tools.
...
man discovered a piece of Gold...
...
... And so came the famous phrase in which we always say,
"TGIF"! (which meaning: Take Gold If Found)
土曜日
On Saturday..
Man diligently tilled the Soil,
and planted crops for harvest next season.
日曜日
On Sunday..
Man took a rest from the sweltering Sun,
and devises a fermentation process for the rice wine, known as sake.
I ran out of ideas. hahaha
You know the Folk Song, Monday's child..
Monday's child is fair of face
tue's is full of grace
wed's is full of woe
thu's has far to go
fri's is loving and giving
sat's works hard for his living
sun's is bony and blithe, and good and gay (in other words, homosexual)
- and interruption!! -
TCHAIKOVSKY'S - SUITE NO. 4 IN G, OP. 61 'MOZARTIANA'- THE USSR ACADEMIC SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA - YEVGENY SVETLANOV (Conductor)
Wtf.. I'm hearing Mozart's "Ave Verum Corpus" on this piece? It's refreshing! It rocks my world! What exactly is going on here?
月曜日
On Monday..
a pale Moon hung over the evening sky
shining a path for Man in the wilderness.
火曜日
On Tuesday..
Man discovered Fire
and inevitably burns himself in the process.
水曜日
On Wednesday..
Man bathed in Water
to treat his burns and refresh himself.
木曜日
On Thursday..
Man collected Wood
to keep himself safe and warm.
金曜日
On Friday..
Man discovered a piece of Gold...
for which he used for designing his tools.
...
man discovered a piece of Gold...
...
... And so came the famous phrase in which we always say,
"TGIF"! (which meaning: Take Gold If Found)
土曜日
On Saturday..
Man diligently tilled the Soil,
and planted crops for harvest next season.
日曜日
On Sunday..
Man took a rest from the sweltering Sun,
and devises a fermentation process for the rice wine, known as sake.
I ran out of ideas. hahaha
You know the Folk Song, Monday's child..
Monday's child is fair of face
tue's is full of grace
wed's is full of woe
thu's has far to go
fri's is loving and giving
sat's works hard for his living
sun's is bony and blithe, and good and gay (in other words, homosexual)
- and interruption!! -
TCHAIKOVSKY'S - SUITE NO. 4 IN G, OP. 61 'MOZARTIANA'- THE USSR ACADEMIC SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA - YEVGENY SVETLANOV (Conductor)
Wtf.. I'm hearing Mozart's "Ave Verum Corpus" on this piece? It's refreshing! It rocks my world! What exactly is going on here?
Monday, April 07, 2008
Bicycle. Pandas. Bacon, and Big Sis'
I've got to get my parents to stop bothering me about my "bicycling adventures".
It's only an occasional bike ride I get once in two weeks!
And this lil' panda ate his way into my subconciousness. I know - it was Jonathan Soh, who always coveted the hello pandas when we hit the canteen. I'm not sure how's he doing now anyway.
you know, it kinda reminds you not to stay up late.
It's my fortune, to have a friend (YT) who's willing to spur me on, check whether I've done my homework, and how I'm getting on in life. I am really thankful, for the sincere reminders you give. Thanks to you (and your father), I have greater motivation to read up and further my knowledge.
"Reading maketh a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man."
A just quote by Sir Francis Bacon.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Seeing old friends
I booked out... Attended Kai Ling's birthday party yesterday, at Costa Sands Resort (Pasir Ris). It was more of a party sponsored by her workplace, than a personal one. I met with polymates, Devi and Jing Shya there.
JS has grown beautiful. A mature, fashionable lady. Undoubtedly, my mouth gaped wide-open in surprise, as the first sight of her blew me away. It had been a long time since I've seen her. After the months of my lonely male-dominated NS life (and a year yet to come), I have never seen anyone that has taken me outright, by surprise. She looked different, I reasoned, because she traded her spectacles for contact lenses that evening, and she was wearing fashionable clothes. Not the plain jeans and tee that I've often seen her in the lecture hall. I proceeded to cover up my emotions and converse with her normally. Meanwhile, Devi is now studying IT in general, at PBMS Academy (University of Newcastle). I believe she hasn't changed much.
I can't believe I am still thinking about it. It's probably the effects setting in, of a hapless male-dominated, "motherless-sisterless" miserable seven days in camp. It's difficult for me to accept the concept of a caring male (other than the Medic, of course).
Getting along with fellow males is a problem. Sometimes, they seem too silly, prankish, or terribly childish. Guys can turn vain or "gay-like" to attract the attention of fellow males. Luckily, I get to book out and see my female friends once in a while. Guys can be so condescending towards each other. The girls I associate with, have a patience and attention-span threefold to that of guys I know.
No, no. There's no substitute for the care and concern shown by a female. And I mean it. No FHM magazine, MAXIM, etc.. can substitute genuine care in this world. *Tosses the magazines away* And they certainly can't substitute good literature. And realising that is attaining enlightenment.
JS has been working for 11 months at SGH as a lab technician, part of a two-year contract. The way she speaks, and the way she carries herself, has become well.. professional. Which makes me wonder how I will be able to carry off myself, 21 this year. Time to shed the boyish grin, the angst, and pick up the helm of confidence, of responsibility, the air of self-assuredness.. and ah.. etcetera. It's not meaning to say that I feel like going after JS. I was just musing on a little fantasy (like Hachiko does in NANA) After what mom said, something like, don't be a silly boy and should leave it all to fate. I won't be going after anyone. I guess I should just play the cards I have, and don't risk getting busted (sum of cards above 21).
Hey. why's there the 21 connection? It just came out of nowhere. Well I'll be damned.
JS has grown beautiful. A mature, fashionable lady. Undoubtedly, my mouth gaped wide-open in surprise, as the first sight of her blew me away. It had been a long time since I've seen her. After the months of my lonely male-dominated NS life (and a year yet to come), I have never seen anyone that has taken me outright, by surprise. She looked different, I reasoned, because she traded her spectacles for contact lenses that evening, and she was wearing fashionable clothes. Not the plain jeans and tee that I've often seen her in the lecture hall. I proceeded to cover up my emotions and converse with her normally. Meanwhile, Devi is now studying IT in general, at PBMS Academy (University of Newcastle). I believe she hasn't changed much.
I can't believe I am still thinking about it. It's probably the effects setting in, of a hapless male-dominated, "motherless-sisterless" miserable seven days in camp. It's difficult for me to accept the concept of a caring male (other than the Medic, of course).
Getting along with fellow males is a problem. Sometimes, they seem too silly, prankish, or terribly childish. Guys can turn vain or "gay-like" to attract the attention of fellow males. Luckily, I get to book out and see my female friends once in a while. Guys can be so condescending towards each other. The girls I associate with, have a patience and attention-span threefold to that of guys I know.
No, no. There's no substitute for the care and concern shown by a female. And I mean it. No FHM magazine, MAXIM, etc.. can substitute genuine care in this world. *Tosses the magazines away* And they certainly can't substitute good literature. And realising that is attaining enlightenment.
JS has been working for 11 months at SGH as a lab technician, part of a two-year contract. The way she speaks, and the way she carries herself, has become well.. professional. Which makes me wonder how I will be able to carry off myself, 21 this year. Time to shed the boyish grin, the angst, and pick up the helm of confidence, of responsibility, the air of self-assuredness.. and ah.. etcetera. It's not meaning to say that I feel like going after JS. I was just musing on a little fantasy (like Hachiko does in NANA) After what mom said, something like, don't be a silly boy and should leave it all to fate. I won't be going after anyone. I guess I should just play the cards I have, and don't risk getting busted (sum of cards above 21).
Hey. why's there the 21 connection? It just came out of nowhere. Well I'll be damned.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
a piece of scrap
Weakness is that
I'm
Unfocused
leaving
things
off
unfinished.
Need
to
set
clear
realistic
goals
and move towards
accomplishing them.
I'm
Unfocused
leaving
things
off
unfinished.
Need
to
set
clear
realistic
goals
and move towards
accomplishing them.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
whereabouts of a free child
it's a rainyyyy day. CAT 1! CAT 1!!
0445 wakey wakey. can't get back to sleep.
0500 Hung out clothes to dry. grabbed mp3 radio.
0600 went out cycling until-
0750 cycled up and downhill Fort Canning Hill (Dangerous),
0800 jogged around Fort Canning Hill (parked two-wheels).
0850 ate Delicateseen 01x Bacon Sausage @ Cold Storage.
0900 cycled up Mount Sophia and down (Dangerous)
0940 cycled to Bugis Junction (parked two-wheels).
1000 went to National Library.
1030 hung around Lee Kong Chian Reference Library L7.
1200 departed NLB to Bugis Junction, then
1300 cycled back to Old Airport Hawker Centre for lunch (parked two-wheels).
i am learning nihongo diligently from now on. hiragana, katakana, I shall conquer.
no big feat is too small.
the chicken broth of the Chiikin Ramen last night was fantajiru, heavenly.
Monday, March 10, 2008
At home, I found several items missing from my memory, and I've been pondering about their whereabouts. My utility mp3 player and my OPs diary. Basically, I need the Ops diary to write stuff in.
I need to make a commitment for spending time. I want to focus on 2 areas. To learn guitar chords and learn the japanese language. Anime and Manga eyeballing, Cycling, and training for Standing Broad Jump (SBJ) will be my leisure for now.
I need to make a commitment for spending time. I want to focus on 2 areas. To learn guitar chords and learn the japanese language. Anime and Manga eyeballing, Cycling, and training for Standing Broad Jump (SBJ) will be my leisure for now.
Friday, March 07, 2008
Visions
How far I've come.. And in my mind,
in the white misty clouds, the soaring dragon - the mandarin species - decorated with snake scales, bearing goat's horns, and baring teeth from her lion head..
The lion-snake monster spun around with great speed, and her head noticed, with alarm, her tail vanishing behind her. Strong light blinded her eyes as she looked back. Maybe I was thinking of Hari the Dragon in Spirited Away.. So tell me my fortune from this vision.
in the white misty clouds, the soaring dragon - the mandarin species - decorated with snake scales, bearing goat's horns, and baring teeth from her lion head..
The lion-snake monster spun around with great speed, and her head noticed, with alarm, her tail vanishing behind her. Strong light blinded her eyes as she looked back. Maybe I was thinking of Hari the Dragon in Spirited Away.. So tell me my fortune from this vision.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Sunday, February 24, 2008
GRAFFITI
life is pour living, not reflection!
Japanese anime/dvds I've watched for the past week and <3 'ed
Claymore
Beautiful Life
The Girl Who Leapt Through Time
Spirited Away
Gundam Seed Destiny
D Gray Man
Happiness
TERESA IS THE COOLEST CLAYMORE EVER-!
=END OF COMMUNICATION=
=GRAFFITI SECTION=
Have you lived it up today? I'm livin' it!
getting what you wanted,
what you've always wanted
Influence - my style of cryptic writing is typical of a lazy writer's block or people like macabre Stanley Donwood or Thom Yorke from Radiohead. It's like the RANDOM WTF NONSENSE FROM LUSH 99.5FM, that makes you question less and appreciate more. It's ungrammatical and purposely mispelt, just like those lousy designs on cheap T-shirts from those 3rd world countries.. I've started playing this style in 2007. It signifies nothing, it's up to you to imagine. i'm feeling uncommunicative and I don't care about you.
Tell me about that place - the dark place in your mind, I don't mind telling people about.
Tell me.
Japanese anime/dvds I've watched for the past week and <3 'ed
Claymore
Beautiful Life
The Girl Who Leapt Through Time
Spirited Away
Gundam Seed Destiny
D Gray Man
Happiness
TERESA IS THE COOLEST CLAYMORE EVER-!
=END OF COMMUNICATION=
=GRAFFITI SECTION=
Have you lived it up today? I'm livin' it!
getting what you wanted,
what you've always wanted
Influence - my style of cryptic writing is typical of a lazy writer's block or people like macabre Stanley Donwood or Thom Yorke from Radiohead. It's like the RANDOM WTF NONSENSE FROM LUSH 99.5FM, that makes you question less and appreciate more. It's ungrammatical and purposely mispelt, just like those lousy designs on cheap T-shirts from those 3rd world countries.. I've started playing this style in 2007. It signifies nothing, it's up to you to imagine. i'm feeling uncommunicative and I don't care about you.
Tell me about that place - the dark place in your mind, I don't mind telling people about.
Tell me.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Personal 'z'
It's a week away from the Lunar New Year, but I ain't that excited, because my vocation in Naval Base security would have me miss out on two days of the holiday festival - the very much coveted New Year's Eve reunion dinner - and of seeing all my close relatives at the round table (which used to be quite close) until my Grandma passed away last march - unwittingly, I have turned away from them, exploring life independently through my own unbiased eyes - and here doing my time in NS.
I keep reminiscing, thinking as always, of the moments I was there, a formal distance away, from my respected role model and friend in music, and her timeless book recommendations, which solidify as her special collection in my mind. Kafka. Harry Potter. Haruki Murakami. The film, Cinema Paradiso. It is food for thought. Then out of respect for my own feelings, I often wonder aloud - why our friendship doesn't quite work out. Perhaps the problem lies with me, not her. I don't know how to get along with her mood. Without hearing from her much now and then, it leaves quite a lot of room for my self-doubt. Does she still care? Where once, she reassuringly convinced me of our friendship... I don't think we were ever friends by default. (Maybe from a cold and distant view, we were friends arisen from necessity. That we have both but met for a period of times, for business purposes in one of our recreational circles, and we spared each other a little kindness to facilitate our goals in recreation) But that's a cruel thought to say about her. Friends don't need each other. They won't leave their doors and windows open? At this juncture, I would damn myself for thinking so badly of a friend. well, I say that I would drop those damn thoughts now. and move on to something else.
The Straits Times columnist Sumiko Tan, engaged in a bout of self-talk in her personal column, that she was in her 30-40s and complains about the dreary nature of weekends, that being single made time pass away slowly. But she also comments on the perks of being single- meaning more time to read her favourite books, shopping at different shops, watch. I can empathise with that feeling. It's something I can anticipate ending up doing, and so I can think about what to do then, if I end up single for the rest of my life.
End of personal entry.
Songs to Check out:
Coldplay - Clocks (Avocado Blue mix)
"Rhythms Del Mundo
Now if the currently burning bossa nova rage has sent you craving for something more authentically Latino, then there is Rhythms Del Mundo. This is no bossa nova album. It is made up of Cuban music fused with a pop feel and faithful to its African origins. This is a collaborative effort from artists of various countries in aid of Artists Project Earth (APE) which lends support for natural disaster relief and climate change awareness. The artists involved support the album as a show of commitment to the music and the cause it endorses and those artists are mighty bit names.
The star-studded production features famous pop tracks like Clocks by Coldplay; Better Together by Jack Johnson; Dancing Shoes by Arctic Monkeys; One Step Too Far by Dido & Faithless; I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For by Coco Freeman featuring U2; She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5; Modern Way by Kaiser Chefs; Fragilidad by Sting; The Dark of the Matinee by Coco & Franz Ferdinand; High and Dry by Lele & Radiohead all given new Afro-Cuban arrangements by the famous Buena Vista Social Club whose singers perform vocals in As Time Goes By by Ibrahim Ferrer and Killing Me Softly by Omara Portuondo." Something I'd like to hear for the kick of it.
Regina Carter - This Can't Be Love (very jazzy, perky arrangement.)
Top Rocking - The Real New World (very interesting rap)
BUGZ_IN_THE_ATTIC - it don't work like that
UNITED_FUTURE_ORGANIZATIO OSUNLADE - LISTEN LOVE
Late Night Alumni - Seemingly Sleepy (trancy-trancy-dreamy dreemlike state. music plays with your subconcious... Zzz..)
GAVIN FRIDAY - Angel
I keep reminiscing, thinking as always, of the moments I was there, a formal distance away, from my respected role model and friend in music, and her timeless book recommendations, which solidify as her special collection in my mind. Kafka. Harry Potter. Haruki Murakami. The film, Cinema Paradiso. It is food for thought. Then out of respect for my own feelings, I often wonder aloud - why our friendship doesn't quite work out. Perhaps the problem lies with me, not her. I don't know how to get along with her mood. Without hearing from her much now and then, it leaves quite a lot of room for my self-doubt. Does she still care? Where once, she reassuringly convinced me of our friendship... I don't think we were ever friends by default. (Maybe from a cold and distant view, we were friends arisen from necessity. That we have both but met for a period of times, for business purposes in one of our recreational circles, and we spared each other a little kindness to facilitate our goals in recreation) But that's a cruel thought to say about her. Friends don't need each other. They won't leave their doors and windows open? At this juncture, I would damn myself for thinking so badly of a friend. well, I say that I would drop those damn thoughts now. and move on to something else.
The Straits Times columnist Sumiko Tan, engaged in a bout of self-talk in her personal column, that she was in her 30-40s and complains about the dreary nature of weekends, that being single made time pass away slowly. But she also comments on the perks of being single- meaning more time to read her favourite books, shopping at different shops, watch. I can empathise with that feeling. It's something I can anticipate ending up doing, and so I can think about what to do then, if I end up single for the rest of my life.
End of personal entry.
Songs to Check out:
Coldplay - Clocks (Avocado Blue mix)
"Rhythms Del Mundo
Now if the currently burning bossa nova rage has sent you craving for something more authentically Latino, then there is Rhythms Del Mundo. This is no bossa nova album. It is made up of Cuban music fused with a pop feel and faithful to its African origins. This is a collaborative effort from artists of various countries in aid of Artists Project Earth (APE) which lends support for natural disaster relief and climate change awareness. The artists involved support the album as a show of commitment to the music and the cause it endorses and those artists are mighty bit names.
The star-studded production features famous pop tracks like Clocks by Coldplay; Better Together by Jack Johnson; Dancing Shoes by Arctic Monkeys; One Step Too Far by Dido & Faithless; I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For by Coco Freeman featuring U2; She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5; Modern Way by Kaiser Chefs; Fragilidad by Sting; The Dark of the Matinee by Coco & Franz Ferdinand; High and Dry by Lele & Radiohead all given new Afro-Cuban arrangements by the famous Buena Vista Social Club whose singers perform vocals in As Time Goes By by Ibrahim Ferrer and Killing Me Softly by Omara Portuondo." Something I'd like to hear for the kick of it.
Regina Carter - This Can't Be Love (very jazzy, perky arrangement.)
Top Rocking - The Real New World (very interesting rap)
BUGZ_IN_THE_ATTIC - it don't work like that
UNITED_FUTURE_ORGANIZATIO OSUNLADE - LISTEN LOVE
Late Night Alumni - Seemingly Sleepy (trancy-trancy-dreamy dreemlike state. music plays with your subconcious... Zzz..)
GAVIN FRIDAY - Angel
Email: Through a Rapist's Eyes
"THIS is important information for females of ALL ages.
When this was sent to me, I was told to forward it to my lady friends, but I forwarded it to most everyone in my address book. My men friends have female friends and this information is too important to miss someone.
Please pass it along.
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly . Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.
3) They also look for women on their cell phone , searching through their purse, or doing other activities while walking because they are off-guard and can be easily overpowered.
4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5:00a.m. and 8:30a.m.
5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots . Number two: is office parking lots/garages. Number three: is public restrooms.
6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to another location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.
7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.
8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas , or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.
10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: 'I can't believe it is so cold out here,' 'we're in for a bad winter.' Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.
11) If someone is coming toward you , hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK ! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back.
Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes) , yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
13) If someone grabs you , you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit) OR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it - it hurts.
14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and he's out of there.
15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible . The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!
You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!
2.Learned this from a tourist guide in New Orleans . If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM . Toss it away from you....chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3.If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4.Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.
a. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot or parking garage:
A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.
B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.
IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, preferably in a zigzag pattern!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.'
The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it , but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.
Please pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying baby ----This
should be taken seriously because the Crying Baby theory was mentioned on America's Most Wanted this past Saturday when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana.
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well."
End of Email.
When this was sent to me, I was told to forward it to my lady friends, but I forwarded it to most everyone in my address book. My men friends have female friends and this information is too important to miss someone.
Please pass it along.
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly . Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.
3) They also look for women on their cell phone , searching through their purse, or doing other activities while walking because they are off-guard and can be easily overpowered.
4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5:00a.m. and 8:30a.m.
5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots . Number two: is office parking lots/garages. Number three: is public restrooms.
6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to another location where they don't have to worry about getting caught.
7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.
8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas , or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.
10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: 'I can't believe it is so cold out here,' 'we're in for a bad winter.' Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.
11) If someone is coming toward you , hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK ! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back.
Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes) , yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
13) If someone grabs you , you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit) OR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it - it hurts.
14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble and he's out of there.
15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible . The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!
You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!
2.Learned this from a tourist guide in New Orleans . If a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM . Toss it away from you....chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3.If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4.Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.
a. If someone is in the car with a gun to your head DO NOT DRIVE OFF, repeat: DO NOT DRIVE OFF! Instead gun the engine and speed into anything, wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the person is in the back seat they will get the worst of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run. It is better than having them find your body in a remote location.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot or parking garage:
A.) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor, and in the back seat.
B.) If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
C.) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out.
IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN, preferably in a zigzag pattern!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP! It may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked 'for help' into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
9. Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.'
The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way, whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it , but have had several calls by women saying that they hear baby's cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.
Please pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying baby ----This
should be taken seriously because the Crying Baby theory was mentioned on America's Most Wanted this past Saturday when they profiled the serial killer in Louisiana.
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to pass it onto them, as well."
End of Email.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Christophe Willem
French Idol '06
Quand je serai grand, je serai Bee Gees
"When I grow up, I will be Bee Gees"
Ou bien pilote de formule 1 "Or a pilot in Formula 1"
En attendant je me déguise "In the meantime I'm a mere disguise"
C’est vrai que tous les costumes me vont bien "It's true that all my costumes take me far"
Le rouge le noir "The red black"
Le blues l’espoir "The blues hope"
Et moi "And I"
De toutes les couleurs j’aime en voir "Of all the colors I see"
C’est comme ça qu’est ce que j’y peux "That's the way I can be"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Oui "Yes"
Quand je serai grand ce sera facile "When I grow it will be easy"
Enfin je saurai qui je suis "I'll finally know who I am"
Mais En attendant je me défile "But I'm reading scrolls"
C’est vrai "It's true"
Je me dérobe et je me fuis "I stole and I"
Je pleurs, "I cry"
je ris, "I laugh"
J’ai peur, "I fear"
Envie, "Envy"
Je sais De toutes les couleurs, je vais en voir "I know all the colors, I will see"
A qui la faute ? "Who is to blame?"
Je suis l’un et l’autre "I am both"
Double je "I'm Double"
A qui la faute ? "Who is to blame?"
Je suis l’un et l’autre "I am both"
C’est comme ça qu’est ce que j’y peux "That's the way I can be"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Après tout qu’est ce que j’y peux "After all that is what I can"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Quand je serai grand qu’on se le dise
"When I grow up they will say"
Je serai vendeur dans les magasins "I will be selling in the stores"
En entendant, je me déguise "In the meantime I'll disguise"
En chantant dans ma salle de bain "By singing in my bathroom"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Quand je serai grand je serai dans le show biz… "When I grow up I will be in show biz"
Je sais, de toutes les couleurs j'aime en voir. "I know all the colors I'll see."
A qui la faute je suis l'un et l'autre "Whose fault I am both."
Double je "I'm Double"
...
Double je - Translated from lyrics with help from google translator.
I stumbled on this artist, Nouvelle Star a year ago. I like Willem's voice. Both facial features and voice quality remind me of Daniel Singh. I'm impressed cause I thought it was a girl singing initially. The strong beat in the song makes you wanna dance!
Well, from viewing this video, you can see a few french beauties as Willem dutifully and gracefully, dances his fingers on the piano keys. And it seems a little propaganda on French receptivity to their homegrown talent. In the last scene of Willem walking away, one muses, that he is simply another being living in a city of millions, and not any larger than life.
The alternate interpretation, incorporates a more sound understanding, but makes the song immoral. If you understood the lyrics, the song is about a voyeur, who peeps from a A room with a view (i.e. Chambre Avec Vue), at/from Bristol hotel. So although the lyrics are perverted, the french concept of open romanticism is compensated by the majestic string ensemble in the background. It seems so dreamy, this look at voyeurism. As he sings in the last line, "existantelle." Ah... to capture this moment of existence...?
Quand je serai grand, je serai Bee Gees
"When I grow up, I will be Bee Gees"
Ou bien pilote de formule 1 "Or a pilot in Formula 1"
En attendant je me déguise "In the meantime I'm a mere disguise"
C’est vrai que tous les costumes me vont bien "It's true that all my costumes take me far"
Le rouge le noir "The red black"
Le blues l’espoir "The blues hope"
Et moi "And I"
De toutes les couleurs j’aime en voir "Of all the colors I see"
C’est comme ça qu’est ce que j’y peux "That's the way I can be"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Oui "Yes"
Quand je serai grand ce sera facile "When I grow it will be easy"
Enfin je saurai qui je suis "I'll finally know who I am"
Mais En attendant je me défile "But I'm reading scrolls"
C’est vrai "It's true"
Je me dérobe et je me fuis "I stole and I"
Je pleurs, "I cry"
je ris, "I laugh"
J’ai peur, "I fear"
Envie, "Envy"
Je sais De toutes les couleurs, je vais en voir "I know all the colors, I will see"
A qui la faute ? "Who is to blame?"
Je suis l’un et l’autre "I am both"
Double je "I'm Double"
A qui la faute ? "Who is to blame?"
Je suis l’un et l’autre "I am both"
C’est comme ça qu’est ce que j’y peux "That's the way I can be"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Après tout qu’est ce que j’y peux "After all that is what I can"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Quand je serai grand qu’on se le dise
"When I grow up they will say"
Je serai vendeur dans les magasins "I will be selling in the stores"
En entendant, je me déguise "In the meantime I'll disguise"
En chantant dans ma salle de bain "By singing in my bathroom"
(Faudrait savoir ce que tu veux) "Should about what you want"
Quand je serai grand je serai dans le show biz… "When I grow up I will be in show biz"
Je sais, de toutes les couleurs j'aime en voir. "I know all the colors I'll see."
A qui la faute je suis l'un et l'autre "Whose fault I am both."
Double je "I'm Double"
...
Double je - Translated from lyrics with help from google translator.
I stumbled on this artist, Nouvelle Star a year ago. I like Willem's voice. Both facial features and voice quality remind me of Daniel Singh. I'm impressed cause I thought it was a girl singing initially. The strong beat in the song makes you wanna dance!
Well, from viewing this video, you can see a few french beauties as Willem dutifully and gracefully, dances his fingers on the piano keys. And it seems a little propaganda on French receptivity to their homegrown talent. In the last scene of Willem walking away, one muses, that he is simply another being living in a city of millions, and not any larger than life.
The alternate interpretation, incorporates a more sound understanding, but makes the song immoral. If you understood the lyrics, the song is about a voyeur, who peeps from a A room with a view (i.e. Chambre Avec Vue), at/from Bristol hotel. So although the lyrics are perverted, the french concept of open romanticism is compensated by the majestic string ensemble in the background. It seems so dreamy, this look at voyeurism. As he sings in the last line, "existantelle." Ah... to capture this moment of existence...?
Friday, January 04, 2008
Gone, Gone, Gone
Man I love this song. Actually I was searching for the BeatleSung, but this soulful Lefty Frizzel thing came up. Hehe. The one historical gig they did up on the rooftop of Apple Studios, 1969. That must have made them, and the audiences feel so high.
And to you in question... Well, lead your own life. I don't care about you anymore. And You're not my cup of tea either. *takes revolver in a SUPER-UPSET mood =( and goes blam - * I imagine now, that I have a great deal of booze on my hands, and I will drink the bottle, the jug dry. Everything. Every last drop. And let it burn down my throat, burn away those painful memories, and relight the fire in my heart...
And a fiery light emerged - from those black smouldering coals in the background. My loyal, faithful Alsation curled up beside me in the cosy hearth...
... Like a crutch of a handicapped man.
Things ain't so bad... While you can still fantasise, that you have lived your life in a wooden cabin, and that you're an aged Caucasian male sitting on your rocker in front of the fireplace in a children's storybook. A shoemaker, a watchmaker, a clockmaker, whatever.. Oh. except that it ain't real.
The BeatleSung. Yes, come to think of it, you do resemble John Lennon in a way. Thank you for watching. =))
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