It's time to fall asleep

my days are getting quite meaningless to begin with.

I see no point in my existence in 'cyberspace'. I doubt I'd be missed, unless I make my appearances less often. I wonder how come none of my old CCA peeps are talking to me? Is it bcos they have taken offense at me quitting for no apparent reason at all? Nobody understands how I felt the subsequent weeks following which I 'quit choir', stopped myself coming for practices... I desired someone, anyone, to tell me I'm still needed, unless my presence is of no value at all...

For which I waited and waited... But no query came. No question of what was happening to me:

"Depressive, addictive withdrawal; it was hell,
Sunlight burning the snail inside the shell..."

-some ditty I came up with on the spot

Questions tormented me in my sleep. ~but it was all for the best I suppose. The stress was something to be dealt with on its own. And I had one less excuse for my academic mistakes. Unanswered questions.. Up till now, I wanted to stop thinking, to let things rest.

Days of listening to Bach's Double Violin Concerto in D Minor BWV 1043 II (Largo Ma Non Tanto) of sweeping melancholy. Sweet at the beginning, then progresses to such sweet sorrow, like the weeping of 2 ladies. Well... I dunno... that's what it sounds like to me.

No matter, my secretive nature was difficult to understand to begin with. Let me live my life, love and die in peace. The boy in the well (~REM).